


心のモノローグ

by sheol93



Category: Mamamoo
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Emotional Constipation, Emotionally Repressed, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Sexual Tension, Smut, and byul a broke college student, and they are messy lesbians, can moonsun just get their shit together, chuuves are wholesome, established chuuves, god bless their friends, hyejin will bust a neck vein someday istg, yongsun is a sugar mommy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2020-07-11 15:50:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 41,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19930585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheol93/pseuds/sheol93
Summary: Kim Yongsun is a rich lesbian CEO and Moon Byulyi is the broke college student whose sugar mommy she decided to become.





	1. Chapter 1.

**Author's Note:**

> I started this au on my twitter (@_solarist) for fun a couple of months ago and it developed into a more serious story. Updating on twitter is tiring, so I am moving it here for a more comfortable reading. Take into account that the first chapters were made to fit twitter, so the pace of the story might be fast and awkward at first, but it improves as the story progresses. Please keep that in mind!
> 
> If you have read this story back in twitter, hello again! If it is your first time, welcome and please enjoy! Feedback is very much appreciated, I love reading what people think after every update! So don't be a silent reader, please!
> 
> I took the title from a Nogizaka46's song:
> 
> 「心のモノローグ」
> 
> ROM: Kokoro no Monologue
> 
> ENG: Monologue of the Heart
> 
> (It is a bop, so search it up!!)

The day Moon Byulyi and Kim Yongsun met, they were in a cafeteria, and like in every story, a cliche ensued, as they tried to get in at the same time and got stuck in the door. Byul, always the gentlewoman, let Yongsun go in first; Yongsun, quite awestruck by the younger girl's charming smile and because of her own raging lesbianism, sat close to where Byul was.

“I don’t make enough money to pay my meals, why did you even insist on dragging me here if I won’t drink anything?" Byul whined to her companion, an underclassman named Jung Wheein. 

"Stop crying around and find a goddamn job, unnie." Wheein replied back and Yongsun's ears perked at the information before she went to the counter to order.

"Excuse me, I didn’t order this," startled, Byul looked up at the waiter when he put an extra large coffee and a big piece of brownie in front of her a few minutes later, surprise lacing every note of her voice.

"That lady over there paid for it," was the only reply she got before the waiter left their table, and her eyes fixed on the pretty elegant woman she got stuck at the door with.

Yongsun, feeling observed, looked up from her phone and her eyes locked with Byul’s. On her face got painted a smile and, rising her eyebrows, she took her coffee to her lips in a silent invitation for the younger girl to do the same. Byul was speechless and the silence was only broken by Wheein’s low whistle.

"Damn ma," Wheein whispered, "it seems you got yourself a sugar mommy now," Wheein smirked, eyeing the elegant woman with interest. Byul shushed her when Yongsun, who clearly heard that, widened her smirk, her dark eyes fixed on Byul. "Can you please be quiet?!"

"Why? Offer her a feet pic, maybe she will pay for your tuition fees," Wheein wiggled her brows. "If you are not interested, I am available!" Wheein raised her voice and Byul almost flipped their table over in her rushed attempt to cover her friend's mouth. "Wheein!!!!"

Tired of Wheein being her little shit self, Byul took her coffee and brownie and, with a slight confused glint in her eyes, she approached the (really attractive) suit clad woman, placing both on top of her table once she arrived. 

"Excuse me, but did you order this for me?"

"That I did," Yongsun took a new sip of her drink, her voice low and warm. "Not of your taste?"

"That's not it, and I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but why did you do that, ma'am?" Hesitation took over Byul's face, her stance changing from one feet to the other. "I can’t really pay you back..."

"There is no need for that,” Yongsun dismissed the idea with a gesture of her hand, “take it as a thank you for our little moment earlier at the door." Yongsun's smile was sweet, with some small dimples that adorned the corners of her mouth and Byul couldn’t not to stare. Yongsun’s smile widened when she noticed her fixed look on her face and that took Byul out of her daze, faking a cough at being caught staring before averting her gaze. 

"Well, then I will make sure to enjoy it, miss-?" 

"Yongsun, Kim Yongsun. And please, do." Yongsun bowed her head slightly as she introduced herself, her business persona also present as she offered her hand for a handshake as well. "And your name is..?" Yongsun let her words fade into a question, and Byul was quick enough to shake Yongsun's hand while she returned a small dip of her head. 

"Moon Byulyi, ma'am."

"Pretty name, almost like a poem," Yongsun's smirk was feline, all white teeth and mystery, and Byul could only gulp at the intensity of the older woman’s brown eyes. “Can I get your number, Byulyi?" Yongsun was blunt, interest obvious in her pupils.

"M-My number?"

"Yes, your phone number," the older woman was patient, waiting for Byul to react, but the only reaction she received was Wheein's teasing snickers from the other table. Byul blushed furiously.

Even before Byul could even begin to form an answer, Yongsun offered her phone. Instinctively, Byul took the device and entered her digits, only realizing what she had done when the older woman's fingertips grazed her own as she took her phone back. 

"Thank you, sweetie."

"W-Well, ma'am, I-.. Me and my friend gotta go to class," Byul offered a flustered smile, taking a step backwards after getting back her brownie and her coffee, lifting them up slightly. "Thank you again for these."

Yongsun simply nodded with a smile, taking her coffee to her lips once again. "Sure, have a good one."

Blush was all over Byul's face as she rushed back to her table and, ignoring Wheein's teasing smirk, she whispered, "pack your shit, we're leaving."

"Damn unnie, who got your panties that twisted?" The younger girl couldn’t be contained so Byul just dragged her towards the door.

On their way out, Wheein forced a stop next to Yongsun's table, and waited with a smile until the older woman looked up at her with a smile on her own, "yes, sweetie?" Byul was about to faint.

Wheein grinned, dimples popping, "the feet pics offer still stands, ma'am!" she exclaimed, and a breathy yell escaped Byul's throat and then she dragged Wheein towards the exit once again, "think about it, I have been told I have pretty toes!!" 

"Wheein, I swear to god!"

Yongsun could only laugh, following the friends with her gaze as they left the cafeteria. She sighed, finishing her coffee and glancing down at her phone, a small smile appearing on her lips at the prospect of texting miss Moon Byulyi in the near future. That was going to be fun.


	2. Chapter 2.

A week later, Byul received the first text. It came abruptly and late at night, when she was about to get into bed, her stomach almost empty with only a can of tuna in; " _are you busy, Moon Byulyi?_ " was all it read, and Byul blinked in confusion as she replied a short " _who tf r u?_ "

" _Kim Yongsun_ ," was the next text Byul received and her phone almost slipped out of her grip, and before she could reply this time, another text came in, " _are you busy?_ " Byul looked at herself, in her pyjamas and knowing that her face was the embodiment of tiredness; " _not really._ "

" _Great, text me your address, I'll come for you_ ," Byul's jaw fell slack at the bold message, only for uncertainty to hit her full force a second later; " _wait, how do I know you are telling me the truth?_ "

Her eyes travelled nervously all over the screen of her phone, expecting and dreading the reply at the same time. It came shaped as a wordless text, a reply only composed of a single picture that made Byul to growl in agony because of course, the woman had to be a whole snack; clad in a bright red dress that left her shoulders and collarbones deliciously exposed, her long dark mane falling down her back.

Byul liked to think that she wasn’t easily flustered, but Yongsun's bold interest on her and her own curiosity plus the woman's beautiful looks were a dangerous combination that effectively rendered her into a blushing mess, even through just a simple text convo. "Fuck my life."

" _So, the address?_ " came another text at the lack of reply, so Byul just sent the woman the information she wanted. " _Great! I'll be there in 10._ " To say that Byul panicked was an understatement, as she jumped out of bed in a self imposed quest to find a proper outfit.

Ten minutes and a whole fight with her closet later, Byul found herself outside her dorm, wearing some denim overalls and a simple white shirt underneath; it was almost midnight and she really needed comfy clothes. "What am I even doing here this late... I should be sleeping."

Just as she was reconsidering her priorities, a blue Lamborghini stopped smoothly right in front of her. Her face paled when the passenger door opened and she could see Kim Yongsun waving at her. Just how rich was this woman? Byul approached the car, cautious. "Just... wow?"

Yongsun smiled at her, still wearing her elegant red dress from the picture she sent minutes ago. "Get in, Moon Byulyi." Byul did as told, and awkwardly, she sat in the very expensive car, almost scared of moving in case she could break something she couldn’t pay back.

"How was your week?" It was Yongsun natural attempt to small talk, but Byul was too confused and overwhelmed to answer, so instead she asked back, almost in a whisper, "just who are you?" Yongsun frowned, "I'm Kim Yongsun?" and Byul shook her head, "no, I mean... WHO are you?"

Yongsun's knuckles turned white around the wheel, and after a couple of seconds of inner debate she decided to come clean to Byul, "I am a CEO in a famous cosmetic brand," Yongsun turned to look at Byul for an instant, "does Neutrogena rings a bell to you?"

Byul kept silent for a whole minute, digesting the information. She was there, in a magnificent blue lambo with a drop dead gorgeous woman who happened to be a CEO of a worldwide spread company and that was not only rich, but highly probably also gay. Still, Byul had to ask.

"So you are a CEO?"

"That I am."

"And rich." It was a statement more than a question.

"You can say so." Byul turned to her.

"Are you gay?" Yongsun chuckled.

"A raging lesbian, yep." 

Silence elongated a few pensive seconds and then, "did you... did you kill your husband too?"

Yongsun extended the silence even after that question, an obvious question mark painting itself on her face, "why would I even have a husband to kill in the first place?"

Okay, so not stan twitter account, Byul thought, and then drew her most charming smile, "nothing, don't mind me! Where are you taking me, anyway?" asked Byul right after, curiosity filling her tone. Yongsun smiled, her eyes fixed on the road. 

"Are you hungry?" she asked back and, as incited by her words, Byul's stomach manifested in a roar that answered itself. Yongsun chuckled, "I guess that's a yes"

Blush seized Byul's face once again, something that seemed to be becoming a pattern when in presence of the older woman. She decided to keep silent, enjoying the smooth feeling of getting a ride on an actual lambo; her questions still unvoiced since it seemed that they wouldn’t get a reply anyway

The car didn't take long to stop and, when Byul realized, they were in the line of a fast food restaurant, "McDonalds, really?" said Byul, the tone of her voice amused beyond end, and Yongsun offered a sheepish smile, "I'm sorry, I’ve been craving like crazy these days..." 

"Who knew rich people needed junk food too.."

"We all have our days, what can I say? What do you want?" asked Yongsun, and Byul just shrugged in response. "I don't mind, the same as you." Yongsun nodded and, minutes later, the smell of fast food and grease filled the car, Byul's stomach manifesting once again, even louder.

With a discreet laugh, Yongsun's drove until they reached the grassy river bank, where she finally parked her car and unbuckled her seatbelt; Byul did the same. While Yongsun dug into the paper McDonalds' bag, the younger girl kept her gaze trained on her, brows furrowing.

"What is this about, ma'am?" Yongsun raised her gaze then, offering a new and calm smile. 

"What do you mean?" Byul huffed slightly, "this," she said, pointing at herself, and the car and the food with a big movement of one of her arms, "why did you ask me out?"

Yongsun put one of her fries in her mouth with a pensive expression and, finally she shrugged, her eyes fixed on Byul's pupils, "and why not?"

Again, Byul's question was answered with another question, and this time she found herself without words to answer.

"Why did you agree to go out with me, in the first place?" one of Yongsun's eyebrows rose slightly and Byul couldn't find in her the snarky comment she would have loved to use as a reply and instead, "I just wanted to be polite..."

Yongsun's eyebrow rose even more, "that's a lie, but it's fine, I'll buy it for now," she took another one of her fries to her mouth, her whole body relaxing suddenly against the car seat. "Just eat, I'll answer later. Don't keep your stomach waiting," and again, it roared and Byul obliged.

Seeing the elegant woman literally inhaling the junk food was a sight Byul never thought she would ever witness, but there they were. Byul took a bite of her burger, closing her eyes while she leaned against the seat; it's been so long since she could afford a fast food menu.

Within minutes, the burgers disappeared and her stomach finally relaxed. Yongsun eyed her, taking a sip of her sugar free cola, and finally said, "I have a proposal for you." Byul stopped every movement, the french fry frozen on its way to her mouth and gave her all her attention. 

Byul was almost vibrating on her seat, as the answers she was seeking were about to be unveiled, "which proposal?" Yongsun licked her lips, and then offered a lopsided smile that Byul didn’t know how to read, "I want you to work for me, Moon Byulyi."

Wait... what?

"Work for you?" Yongsun nodded, "at Neutrogena?"

"No, not at Neutrogena, you are not qualified and you are still a student," Yongsun frowned, "what is your major?"

"IT and programming, why?"

"See? Your major doesn’t even match with our company, so no Neutrogena for you."

"Harsh! Then what?" Yongsun’s eyes were bright under the streetlights and the smile that appeared on her lips was almost seductive.

"I just want you to be with me when I request it, and I will pay you back in money or gifts, just as easy as that," Byul's brain literally short circuited.

"So... you want to employ me as your sugar baby?" Yongsun's smile widened, "something like that, yeah." Byul frowned in confusion, "but why? I don’t understand..." Yongsun started getting frustrated by the constant questioning, so the tone of her voice turned firmer when she spoke again.

"Because I want to. I find you interesting and insanely attractive, is that enough for you?" No, it wasn’t, but the slight cutting edge of Yongsun's voice suppressed the questions that wanted to escape her lips, but it was not enough to stop her next words, "you are rich and gorgeous and a CEO, this doesn’t make sense..."

"It makes sense to me." Yongsun’s business persona came back full force, demanding and almost harsh; she didn’t like to be questioned at work and neither she did in her daily life. She didn’t take long to deflate in a softer tone, "me being a rich CEO doesn’t take away my interest on you." Hesitation flashed in Byul's eyes and Yongsun understood that, so she said, "I just want to spend time with you and pay you back that time you could use on something else, nothing more," that was strangely sweet and Byul's heart raced for a moment.

Her eyes shone with sincerity so Byul gave the idea a thought, letting it insert its roots in her mind and flourish; she was in severe need of money and she enjoyed the pretty woman's company, what was there to lose? Still, she asked, "will I have to send you feet pics?"

Yongsun laughed out loud, catching her plump lower lip with her sharp white teeth, "tempting offer, but there's no need of that," the smile Yongsun shots Byul's way was soft and relaxed, and one of her brows rose in a question. Byul exhaled slowly, "then I guess I should accept."

"Yeah?" Yongsun leaned slightly towards Byul, her smile shining under the streetlights. Byul nodded again, feeling somehow flustered over the sudden proximity, and it was obvious to Yongsun, whose smirk only widened. 

"Great then. Now you are mine every time I want," Yongsun's voice was proud and low, though a sudden spark ignited in her eyes, "but! Only when you don’t have a lot of school work to do, hm?" Yongsun's eyebrow rose again, giving a pointed look to the younger girl, "I don’t want this to interfere with your grades, that's the most important thing." Yongsun nodded, firmly, as if she was trying to get the importance of the matter across.

"Get good grades and I will pay for your tuition, sweetie," and as if that only wasn’t enough to render Byul completely speechless, Yongsun ended her discourse with a flirty wink and the ghost of a caress on Byul's jaw, letting her eyes fall to her lips for a second, smirk widening once again.

"I-... That's a lot of money, though..." Yongsun shrugged, her heated gaze going up to Byul's eyes again, "money is not an issue so don’t worry about that," Byul's mind was racing, it was like light appeared suddenly after being trapped in darkness for a lifetime, "ma'am, I-.."

Yongsun interrupted her then, "okay, first thing I want you to do is to drop the ma'am, it makes me feel old as hell," she grimaced, and Byul couldn’t help to find that somehow endearing, so she nodded her head as Yongsun kept speaking. "Just call me Yongsun or unn-, wait, how old are you?" 

Byul blinked for a second, surprised by the question, but answered without hesitation, "I'm 23 ma-" Yongsun's pointed look in her direction cut her words and then the older girl smiled once again, "just call me unnie, I'm 28."

Byul nodded at Yongsun's request and smiled, feeling somehow more relaxed, "so I only have to spend time with you whenever you want if it doesn’t interfere with my studies and I will get money? Sounds too good to be true, spending time with you is pretty delightful too," she said.

A feline smile flourished on Yongsun's lips at Byul's words, her hand going all the way to the younger girl's face to caress her cheek with her thumb, following her skin until her fingers placed a strand of her long blonde hair behind her ear, "don’t be so cute, or I'll lose it."

Byul's gaze was fixed on Yongsun's blown pupils and it felt like a spell was casted upon them, making it impossible to break the eye contact. But it was Byul who looked away first, a shy smile on her lips and her head ducked to cover her face with her hair; Yongsun exhaled loudly. Then her gaze fell on the clock of the car, brows rising in surprise to discover how late it was, "damn, is it this late already? Time flies when you are enjoying the most, huh?" she chuckled and offered Byul and new and more gentle smile, "I'll take you home."

Their way back was filled with a comfortable silence; there were many blank spaces to fill about each other, but at that time it didn’t come to mind. Sooner than later, the blue lambo stopped in front of Byul's dorm, so she turned to Yongsun with a new smile.

"Thank you so much for tonight, Yongsun unnie, I had a great time. Thank you for the dinner, too," Yongsun chuckled again and shrugged slightly, "don’t thank me, consider the dinner your first payment, uhm?" Byul smiled again and nodded her head, her hand already opening the door.

Before she could leave the car, Yongsun's hand flew towards Byul's wrist, grabbing it in a gentle but firm grip, her thumb tracing circles on her skin and her gaze boring holes in Byul's own pupils, "I will text you soon, uhm?", she breathed out, and if she noticed Byul's skin bristling under her touch, she didn’t comment on it. 

Byul gulped rather loudly, her gaze falling for a second to Yongsun's lips, and nodded again, "I will be waiting for it, unnie." Yongsun's eyes almost glowed in the darkness of the car and, without saying anything, she took Byul's hand to her lips, leaving a single kiss on the back of it before letting it go, a knowing smirk present on her lips, "go and rest, Moon Byulyi." 

Byul, with her face burning, offered Yongsun a last smile before leaving the car, walking all the way towards the entrance of the building. There, she turned around one last time, waving goodbye to the older girl, who waved back at her before speeding her expensive car through Seoul's night streets again.

Once in her dorm room, Byul face-planted on her bed, the heat of blush still burning her cheeks and a very silly smile taking over her lips. She buried her face in her pillow and then she screamed out the giddiness of her heart; her life was about to change and she honestly couldn’t wait.


	3. Chapter 3.

"Let's get this straight.." Wheein said from Byul's desk. 

"I rather keep it gay, to be honest," Byul retorted from her bed, her eyes devouring the pages of the programming book she was reading; Wheein rolled her eyes, "shush! Anyway, so.. hot momma really became sugar momma, hah?”

"I have told you already like 6 times, yes!" Byul put down her book, glaring at her friend, who looked at her from the desk, "she will be paying me for my company and for my grades, how sweet is that?" Wheein mused over her friend words, leaning her head on top of the table.

"Isn't it kind of weird though? She is a CEO, why would she waste her time like this?" Suddenly, one of the cushions of Byul's bed impacted against the back of Wheein's head, "are you implying that spending time with me is a waste of time, Jung Wheein?"

Wheein rubbed her nape, turning towards Byul with a big pout on her face, "of course not, you dingus! But I don't know, it just doesn't really make sense to me, but hey, just roll with it!" Wheein shrugged and Byul exhaled a deep sigh, "I told her the same, but she insisted and to be honest, I really need the money and you know that." 

Wheein's eyes flashed in understandment, of course she was aware of her best friend's economical problems, "do you think I could land a deal with her as well?" she asked suddenly and Byul laughed in response. "Ask her, unnie!"

"I won't ask her anything, oh my god, that would be embarrassing," said Byul, hiding again her flustered face behind her book, "when will you meet her again, by the way?" Wheein asked, doodling absentmindedly on a corner of her text book. 

"I don't know, she said she would text me." Byul let her book to fall on top her chest, her gaze fixed on the ceiling of her room and her thoughts drifting; it's been almost five days since that night with Yongsun and the older woman had been radio silent, and though Byul would never admit it, she was growing impatient.

After all, Yongsun was a promise of money and she was in a desperate situation. She barely made enough money to pay her dorm rent and the window of hope the other woman left open was too tempting not to think about it, about her, almost every hour of the day. She had been studying like crazy all these days, too. Finals were around the corner and the weight of Yongsun’s promise kept getting heavier and heavier each passing day; to say that she was tired was an understatement.

And maybe that was the reason sleep crept into her without noticing, because when she woke up a couple of hours later, with her round glasses still perched on her nose and no sight of Wheein in her room, the soft orange glow coming through the window told her it was the golden hour. Grimacing at a quite sharp headache that started to appear as soon as she opened her eyes, her hands blindly searched for her phone on her bed, finding it under the pillow.

Her eyes bulged then; on top of Wheein's farewell text, Yongsun's name in bold lettering seemed to scream at her.

"Received at 18:30." 

Shit, Byul thought when she noticed the current time; 19:45. Without bothering to reply to Wheein, she opened Yongsun's text, her eyes devouring each word, " _I want to take you out tonight, this week has been awful and I need a distraction._ " Oh. My god.

" _I'm so sorry, I was taking a nap and I woke up just now, omg... the offer still stands?_ " Byul typed a fast response, standing up from the bed to go to the small bathroom of her dorm room and scavenge her medicine cabinet in search of an aspirin to fight her headache. Yongsun's reply didn't take long to arrive, " _of course, is it okay if I stop by in 30?_ "

" _More than okay, after 5 days studying non-stop I definitely need a distraction too, see you later, unnie!_ " Byul replied and then proceeded to go to the bathroom. She heard her phone chime with a new text and when she left the bathroom minutes later, freshly showered, she checked her conversation with the older woman, " _great, don't dress too casual, but also not too elegant. I hope you are hungry._ " Byul smiled and decided to leave the chat on read, starting to decide her outfit. So, what to wear? Good question.

Byul rummaged through her closet, infinite options swimming in front of her eyes; a suit? Too elegant. A dress, maybe? She could definitely pull it off, but she was more comfortable wearing pants. In the end, she decided for a simple and comfy outfit, not complicated at all; some jeans and a checkered button down shirt with a jacket giving it the needed touch of elegance. Still too tired to wear her contact lenses, she opted to wear her glasses as well; her eyes needed a rest, anyway. The clock signaled Yongsun's arrival in the next 5 minutes, so she grabbed her phone and her keys and left.

True to her words, Yongsun stopped her car right in front of Byul just 3 minutes after the younger woman left her apartment. Byul blinked in surprise, though, since the CEO wasn't driving the blue lambo of the past week; instead it was a very luxurious looking silver Mercedes.

Byul gaped at her while she came closer to the car, "just how many cars do you own?" Yongsun laughed softly, offering her a sweet smile and a playful wink, "wouldn't you like to know? Hello to you too, Byul-ah," she said while taking one of Byul's hands, giving it a soft squeeze.

"Hi..." Byul's voice turned soft and almost shy, something that seemed to be customary when she was with the CEO, "where are you taking me tonight?" Yongsun hummed as her car drove them smoothly through Seoul's roads. "There is this new bistro that opened recently and I've been dying to go, and of course I couldn't think about a better company than yours." Yongsun smirked and Byul felt herself warming up because of her words. 

"You flatter me too much, Yongsun unnie," the older woman widened her smirk and spared a quick glance at Byul.

"Not as much as you deserve, but don't worry, I'll take care of it tonight," Yongsun licked her lips, the slow motion of her tongue catching Byul's eyes and making her skin burn; at a red light, Yongsun turned to look at Byul, up and down, taking her in, "I will definitely take care of it tonight, because you look good enough to take a bite of you right now, Byul," her smirk was dangerous and her eyes were dark and Byul's face flushed aggressively, though she couldn't take her gaze away from the older girl. 

"Ehm.. which kind of food do they serve?"

"What?" Yongsun blinked in confusion at the unrelated question, her flirting vanishing in the air. 

"The bistro, unnie, which kind of food do they serve?" The blush on Byul's cheeks was still very much obvious, but she had to change the topic if she didn't want to explode.

"European, though I don't know which country exactly..." The red light changed to green and Yongsun speeded her car again; Byul nodded, pensive. 

"I have never had European food, I'm curious..." Byul leaned her head back on the seat, enjoying the smooth ride to the bistro in silence.

The ride didn't take more than a few minutes, and when Yongsun parked in front of the restaurant, Byul could only look at the building in awe. It certainly wasn't a place she could imagine herself in, but imagination wouldn't be required in a few moments, anyway.

Yongsun got out of the car before she even realized and walked around to get to Byul's door, opening it for her. Byul shot her a charming and thankful smile that dropped from her face the moment her gaze finally took in Yongsun's outfit since she couldn’t see it while they were in the car.

The tight dress hugged Yongsun's body in an almost sinful way and it was too much for Byul because suddenly everything was made of dangerous curves and just too much leather and Byul just wanted to scream when her eyes travelled all the way to Yongsun's knowing smirk.

"Are you okay, Byul-ah?" Yongsun's voice was almost too sweet, with a teasing undertone that didn't go unnoticed by Byul, whose face burned once again.

"P-Perfectly fine..." she breathed and, with a melodious and delicate laugh, Yongsun's arm slipped around Byul's, "shall we?"

Their way into the bistro was short, but in those few second Byul realized just how expensive this meal was going to be. She was distracted looking around, internally panicking just by thinking of the money Yongsun was about to spend in just a meal and she only got back to her senses when the older girl squeezed her arm with her hand, a worried glint in her eyes. 

"Are you okay?" Byul gulped and nodded, licking her own lips, "I am, I am just thinking about how much are you going to spend and my own empty wallet shivers," she offered a smile full of uncertainty.

Yongsun's smile grew, endeared by the younger woman and, before they reached their table, she let herself to have a small moment of weakness where she leaned her head on the taller girl's shoulder, "it's okay, the money is not a problem," Byul gasped at the intimacy, nonetheless.

Their dinner was uneventful and calm, and though Byul was sure that the food they served in each dish was too small to be that expensive, she didn't complain even if she kind of wanted to; the Spanish-Italian restaurant was nice and, though small, the food was delicious.

Yongsun and Byul talked about everything and nothing, with a glass of sweet fruity wine to digest every tiny bit of information they shared about each other; Byul learned that Yongsun was the youngest daughter of one of the main investors of Neutrogena's Korean branch, and that, though she had different dreams, was almost forced to accept the job as a CEO. She didn't disclose where her true passion laid on, and Byul didn't ask.

Yongsun, on the other hand, learned that the cause of Byul's struggles was the death of her parents a few years ago. They left her with a pretty big debt and, being a student, she wasn't qualified for any job, so paying back said debt and surviving was a quite difficult task. The only job she could find was tutoring a small group on high school kids in diverse subjects and with that she made ends meet.

As the dinner was coming to an end, Yongsun's gaze was turning heavier, though the sweet glint of her pupils never disappeared; Byul gulped once again, she could recognize that look. It wasn't like she was scared of the older woman, or that she didn't want her just as much, but she had to play hard to get. Yongsun was her one way ticket to a comfortable life and letting her get into her pants easily could make the older woman to lose interest and find another girl to play with. Byul couldn’t let that happen. She definitely couldn't. 

"Hey..."

Yongsun's whisper took her out of her musings and Byul focused her gaze again on the older woman’s eyes; the right corner of Yongsun's lips rose in a slight smirk, signaling with her head towards the door, "want to get out of here?" Her look was sultry and inviting and Byul cursed internally. Well, fuck. 

Byul sighed and nodded, realizing that maybe resisting the older woman was going to be a little harder than what she expected. They left the restaurant after Yongsun paid and, clinging to Byul's arm, she pressed against one of her sides, "wanna have a drink?"

Their next stop happened to be a club that was the hottest place in Seoul lately; good and not so expensive drinks, the latest hits playing and a large area to dance and or just chill with your friends; the only downside was the high price to enter. But again, money wasn't an issue.

They sat in a small high table where they could perfectly observe the sea of people that danced and grinded against one another on the dancefloor. They were close to each other, maybe too close for Byul's comfort; "it is to talk to you better," had said Yongsun with a smirk.

Byul tried to relax; before her parents died she used to enjoy greatly these kind of places and she always felt at ease there, but a nagging thought kept on scratching on the back of her mind, her eyes dropping to the drink that Yongsun nursed between her hands. She frowned.

"Are you really going to drink, unnie? Remember you have to drive later," Byul gave a pointed look to the older girl, whose smirk only enlarged while her lips closed around glass as she took a small sip. "Don't worry about that, Byul-ah, unnie know what she's doing."

"Uhm..." Byul decided to drop the subject, taking her own drink to her lips to take a sip. The peachy flavour of the cocktail exploded in her mouth and it went down her throat without the characteristic burn of alcohol, which surprised her. She was sure it was an alcoholic drink.

"You like it? I am not good with alcohol, but this little one is a silent killer, it will get to you before you notice it because the burning taste is all gone," Yongsun said with a knowing smile, taking a bigger sip that almost consumed the whole content of her glass.

"Unnie, you are going to end wasted and I really don't want to drive your car," Byul deadpanned, but still, a small smile grazed her features just to see how relaxed the older girl was, "well, Byul..." whispered Yongsun, suddenly coming extremely close to the younger girl.

Byul shuddered slightly when the tip of Yongsun's fingers caressed her earlobe in her attempt of moving away some strands of her long blonde hair. Then the distance almost disappeared when the older woman literally whispered in her ear, "if that's the case you'd have to take care of me, oh?"

The look on Yongsun's eyes when she put some distance between them was proof enough that it wasn't an innocent request, but an innuendo that threw Byul's mind to a wind whirl of thoughts that ended in the same and heated and very much sexual escenario between the two of them. Colour and heat took over Byul's face once again and she decided to just chug down the remains of her drink. That seemed to be Yongsun's plan all along, since she didn't take long to call over a waiter to ask him for two glasses of the same drink.

Byul learned a lot of information about Yongsun during their dinner, but what she learned during their club outing, and by far one of the things she found most surprising, was that Yongsun was a light drinker. Not even three glasses in and her eyes were already hazy and blurred. And as Yongsun was getting more and more drunk, Byul was more and more worried about how the fuck was she supposed to arrive home that night.

But all those worries vanished the moment a tipsy Yongsun grabbed her hand and literally dragged her to the dancefloor. Music flowed and the high volume made their skin vibrate at the rhythm of the beat. Around them, people danced and grinded but Byul's eyes were trained on Yongsun and Yongsun only, watching closely every one of her movements.

Her long dark hair fell over her shoulders and swayed with the music and the blissful expression of her face was almost endearing. But Byul could only see leather and the curve of some hips and then Yongsun took Byul's hands and made her wrap her arms around her body. 𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬… Byul cursed internally, her body growing rigid because she could actually feel every centimeter of Yongsun’s leather clad figure against her own as the older girl pressed her back against her chest, her ass grinding against her at the rhythm of the music. Byul was fucked up.

Byul's fingers digged into Yongsun's hips just as one of the older woman's hands ascended to just bury itself between the younger woman's blonde locks. Byul was literally burning in need and frustration, and she even bared her teeth when Yongsun's neck became accessible to her lips.

But the kiss never landed on soft skin and Byul just stood there, moving to the music, breathing heavily and with clouded eyes, trying to ignore as much as she could the flame that danced between her arms. Yongsun turned around then, deep and blown pupils drilling into Byul.

Byul held her breath then, just as Yongsun's heated gaze fell on her parted and thirsty lips. And when Yongsun started to get closer, Byul just closed her eyes, waiting for it. But only the tip of Yongsun's nose was what caressed Byul's lips, as the lips of the older woman pressed on the corner of her mouth. A frustrated gasp left Byul's throat then, and it turned into a lower and darker sound when Yongsun traced a path of kisses through her cheek until her lips ended on the sensitive and delicate skin of her neck, nibbling and sucking softly.

Byul's legs almost gave out at the contact and, before she even realized, one of her hands was already on Yongsun's ass, pressing herself against the older woman's body. Yongsun hummed against her neck, completely satisfied. Suddenly Byul wasn't able to contain herself and when she finally decided to send her playing hard to get act to hell and enjoy fully, to just go and look for Yongsun's lips to take them in the kiss she has been thinking about for days already, she got surprised by a single finger stopping her way.

Yongsun's hazy eyes, as dangerous and wild as ever, looked back at her. She moved her finger again just for her hand to cup Byul's face and caress her cheek with her thumb. And after tiptoeing just to be able to reach her ear, Yongsun simply said "I don't kiss on the lips, Byul."


	4. Chapter 4.

Byul found herself in the back seat of Yongsun's car, with the older woman next to her and her hand drawing soft circles on her thigh over the fabric of her pants. Her skin was burning under her clothes and she felt her mind getting dizzier by the minute, as Yongsun's lips kept leaving wet open-mouthed kissed on the already bristled skin of her neck. 

Driving the car was Yongsun's personal chauffeur, whose attention was focused completely on the road ahead, without paying mind to the two women at the back of the car. Yongsun really knew what she was doing while she was drinking with the whole purpose of getting wasted with the peachy cocktail, since just as soon as they left the club, the driver was already next to the car, waiting for them. 

Byul didn't know what to do with her own hands, one of them gripping at her own pants and the other closed like a claw on top of the seat, over Yongsun's shoulders. Frustration and arousal were eating her alive, but Yongsun's words in the club still resonated in her head, sharp as a knife. What the hell did Yongsun event mean with that? How could she just turn her on that much, but don't allow a single stupid kiss? It was bothering Byul more than it should, and she knew it. Yongsun was free to decide what to do and Byul was just too hot and bothered to stop thinking about it, feeling a spark of annoyance, even.

"Want to go with me to my house?" It was Yongsun's muffled voice what took her out of her reverie, the hot ghost of her breath on the already wet skin of her neck. Byul looked down, finding again Yongsun's blown wide pupils looking already at her.

Byul was confused, to say the least. Was she inviting her over? And for what? To sleep? To have sex? To have sex but not kiss? Where were the boundaries between them? Now everything felt like a field of egg shells and she was too scared to step on them.

So she decided to just refuse, take care of her own needs herself and go to sleep the night away and dwell in her own thoughts the following day, "I think I should better go to my dorm, unnie. I have a lot to study and I can't sleep over..." That was her excuse.

Yongsun blinked slowly, her drunk and hazed mind taking its time to process and, at the word "study", she sat straight on the seat, putting some distance between both of them, "yeah, right! Studying! Studying is important, you need good grades. I like that you are responsible."

Byul forced a little smile, she didn't have shit to study the next day but she felt too frustrated and confused to just spend the night with the older girl. She really needed to sleep it off. 

"Of course, I am adamant on getting that tuition covered, unnie!" Yongsun just nodded.

After giving the driver Byul's address, she leaned back on the seat, sighing softly. Her cloudy eyes moved to Byul's face again, her arms crossing over her chest, "did you have fun?" The question was soft and her voice almost buttery, and it was enough to ease some of Byul's tension, who just nodded her head with a little smile, "yeah, I had a lot of fun, unnie. You are cute when you get tipsy. Your tolerance is quite questionable, though," Yongsun laughed at that, her teeth digging on her lower lip. Byul could just stare at it.

"I am shit when it comes to alcohol, but still I like it a lot, what can I do?" She shrugged, closing her eyes and resting her head on the seat. Byul took her in now that she couldn't see her, wanting to remember the older girl being that relaxed and at ease.  It was a nice sight. 

The ride didn't take a lot to end, and before she even noticed, she was already next to the car, outside her dorm. Yongsun looked at her from the back seat of the car, reaching out one arm with her fingers extended, a clear demand of holding her hand. When their hands came into contact, Yongsun intertwined their fingers and her thumbs caressed soft circles on Byul's palm and the small gesture sent goosebumps through the entirety of Byul's body; Yongsun's smile was warm and Byul really wanted to kiss her right there.

"I will text you tomorrow, okay? But not to meet, since you will be studying and I don't want to bother you," Yongsun pulled Byul's hand then, taking it to her lips to press a chaste kiss on her knuckles. Blush seized Byul's neck and face, as it was almost customary now.

"Okay, unnie. Rest well, uhm? And drink water to prevent the hangover," Byul offered a small smile then, her eyes without breaking contact with the older girl's lips. If Yongsun noticed, she didn't say anything, she just let go of Byul's hand and retreated back into the darkness of the car. 

"You too, Byul. Have a good day tomorrow. Good night,” and with a last smile, Yongsun closed the window of the car and, finally, it drove into the night once again. Byul followed it with her eyes until it got lost amidst the traffic and then she went home as well.

The next morning she found out that, true to her words, Yongsun had texted her. But what she didn't expect was the content of that text. A bank account number at hers and Yongsun's name and the code to access to the money. Byul was speechless, to say the least.

She hurriedly went to her laptop and put all the information in the bank's website, her eyes bulging at the insane amount of money that was in there. She re-read Yongsun's text once again.

" _Thank you for last night, really. I had a great time, just like every second I spend with you. Study hard, next time I'll give you a credit card to use the money more easily. I can't wait to see you again._ "


	5. Chapter 5.

"Oi, unnie!" Hyejin's raised voice took Byul out of her thoughts, the older girl jumping slightly on the chair before focusing her confused gaze on her friends. Hyejin looked at her with a cocked eyebrow while Wheein sported an uninterested expression, munching on some fries.

They were at the cafeteria where she met Yongsun, and her stare was previously fixed on the chair the older woman was sitting back at that time, "what the hell is wrong with you?" asked Hyejin, an undertone of amusement in her voice.

"She's thinking about sugar, Hyejin-ah." Before Byul could say something, Hyejin already turned her head towards Wheein, a confused glint in her eyes. 

"Sugar?" Wheein just nodded and then busied herself taking a sip of her drink. Hyejin's sharp eyes were back on Byul, narrowing dangerously. Byul didn't like that. 

"Unnie... Are you on drugs?" Hyejin's question was cautious, but still it rendered Byul speechless because... what the hell? Wheein choked on her drink and Byul didn't even bother to care, served her right! Byul just sighed, running a hand through her blonde locks.

She didn't want people to know about her deal with Yongsun. She told Wheein because she was there when she met her, and only for that reason. But Hyejin was her other best friend and it was unsettling to hide stuff from her, so she ended up leaning towards the younger girl.

"Hyejin, I'm not doing drugs but... What I am going to tell you is a secret that only we three know, okay?" Byul was completely serious; Wheein's coughing as background music. Hyejin nodded slowly, leaning towards Byul as well. "You see, this might be surprising and you  probably will be kind of jealous or something, I don't know, but I-" 

Wheein butted in, rolling her eyes, "she has a sugar mommy, Hyejin-ah," Hyejin turned her head towards Wheein so fast that Byul was afraid she'd break her neck.

"A WHAT?!" She exclaimed and right after, Byul shushed her.

"Hyejin! Keep it down, jesus!" Byul smacked her shoulder, leaning back on her chair. Hyejin looked between her two friends, from Wheein's nonchalant attitude to the blur of worry and shyness in Byul's eyes. 

"Oh my god, a sugar mommy?!" Hyejin whispered, leaning closer. Byul nibbled her lower lip, nodding slowly, "but how? I mean, no offense, unnie, but..." Hyejin mover her hand, taking Byul in with a confused frown; Wheein snorted a laugh next to her just as Byul kicked her under the table, "hey now, what does that even mean?!"

"It means, unnie, that though you look like a top we all know you are the bottomest bottom, service top at most," she said, matter of factly. This time Wheein's characteristic loud laugh bloomed from her chest while Byul's face turned beet red, "that's completely unrelated!"

"Oh, is it really?" Hyejin's teasing smirk was on her lips in a matter of seconds and Byul decided to stop sharing information with her. Wheein decided otherwise, though. 

"Anyway, Hyejinie, the sugar mommy gave Byul a whole bank account with enough money to almost pay her debt."

"Oh damn, then she is rich RICH..." Hyejin blinked in surprise, turning to Wheein again and ignoring Byul, who just sighed and closed her eyes, almost disappearing in her seat because of how much she leaned into it. She loved her friends, really, but they could be REALLY annoying.

"And is she hot, though? Time to ask the real questions here," to that question, a small smirk painted on Byul's lips because heck, Yongsun was the hottest woman ever. She anticipated Wheein's answer, and at the lack of it, Byul opened her eyes, looking at her friend in confusion. Wheein was looking straight ahead, an unsettling glint in her eyes and before Byul could turn around, she started talking.

"I don't know, you tell me, Hyejin. She is entering the cafeteria." A strangled sound escaped Byul's throat then and in the rush of turning around to check Wheein’s words, she fell backwards, chair included, in a very ungraceful and noisy way, all the attention on her in a second. Byul wanted to die right there.

But there she was, Kim Yongsun in all her inverted glory, as Byul looked at her from upside down. She cursed internally, very aggressively, when her eyes followed up the bright blue suit pants the woman was wearing and the neatly closed jacket of the same colour that embraced her torso.

A spark ignited in Yongsun's eyes when she took Byul in, an amused smirk painting on her lips as the sound of her heels signaled her steps towards the friends. She stopped next to Byul, looking down at her and with her hands tucked in her pockets. 

"Are you comfortable there?" Byul closed her eyes tightly, she really wanted to die. 

"Very, thank you for asking, unnie." Yongsun's smile widened and her gaze turned towards Wheein, who looked at her with one of her dimpled smiles and towards the other girl, whose surprised expression screamed utter shock.

"We meet again, Wheein-ah, nice to see you," her gaze moved to Hyejin, extending her hand towards her with a small bow, "and you are..?" The youngest took her hand, shaking it and, once she got to function again, she introduced herself, "Ahn Hyejin, ma'am..."

"Nice to meet you, Hyejin, I'm Kim Yongsun," the smile never left her lips and once Byul was on her feet again, her gaze turned to her, a glint of amusement in her dark pupils, "are you okay, uhm?" The tone of her voice dropped an octave as she took a small step towards her.

Byul's nervous gaze turned from Yongsun's dark eyes towards her friend, who were looking at them, not exactly being discreet about it. Yongsun's smirk widened when she realized the real source of Byul's nervousness and slowly and deliberately, she tucked one of the blonde locks  behind her ear, her voice dropping to a whisper, but still long enough to be heard by the two friends. 

"I was just on my way to get some coffee, but seeing you here is even more fulfilling. My day has become sweeter," blush seized Byul's face and, this time, it was Hyejin who choked. Mischief laced on Yongsun's voice.

"Anyway, since I'm already here let me just..." she opened her jacket and took a very expensive looking wallet from the inner pocket. Out of it she pulled a single blue card before putting the wallet back in.

Her arm went then around Byul's thin body until her hand ended on her ass and, smoothly, she slipped the card in the back pocket of her trousers, "here you go, Byul-ah," said Yongsun, patting softly her butt before leaving a chaste kiss on her cheek.

The dark glint of Yongsun's eyes didn't match with the sweetness of her smile and Byul could only narrow her eyes at her because, of course, she was also teasing her. But since her face was beet red anyways, she couldn't do much to defend herself. They looked at each other for a couple of long seconds until Yongsun turned her gaze towards the two friends, who looked at them with disbelief. 

"It was nice meeting you, girls, but I only wanted to grab some coffee before heading to the office. Today will be an awful day and a woman needs her caffeine."

Before leaving, Yongsun turned one last time to Byul, whispering this time for her ears only, "I'll text you later, but I hope you are free tonight," Byul nodded, finally offering the older woman a smile, her hand taking hers in a warm squeeze.

And with that, and once with her coffee, Yongsun left the cafeteria. On their table grew the silence and Byul took the card out of her pocket, breath catching in her throat when she saw that it was a credit card. With that money she could almost finish paying her parents' debt and-

"So..." said Hyejin in a very low voice, taking her out of her thoughts, "when is she fucking you brainless?" Byul looked at her for long seconds before starting getting her things into her backpack, "I'm leaving, tell Yujin that I will tutor her at four at my place."

"What? I'm asking you about banging that hot piece of ass and you're telling me about tutoring my sister?" Hyejin rolled her eyes, shrugging, "unnie, you need to check your priorities!" Hyejin's voice raised as Byul left the cafeteria and, when both friends were alone, she sighed as she turned to Wheein, who just kept silent and enjoying the show. 

The older of the two then took her drink to her lips, taking a sip and Hyejin said, "she is a lucky motherfucker, isn't she?" Wheein smiled against the glass, nodding, "that she is, indeed."


	6. Chapter 6.

"So with these flashcards to study at home I think you can memorize stuff better, they are simple and, honestly, colorful things help at remembering," Byul said to the girl she was tutoring; Ahn Yujin, Hyejin's younger sister. Though they didn't look like each other at all.

Yujin nibbled at her lower lip before offering Byul a big smile, taking the cards in her hands, "thank you, unnie! I tried studying with my sister's help, but she is a mess. She is even worse than I in biology and that's... a lot!" Byul laughed softly, ruffling the younger girl's hair in a gesture of fondness. She has known Yujin since she was a child and she was more than happy to help her study 

"Well, it's Hyejin who we are talking about, so I’m not surprised," Byul shot Yujin a playful wink while the younger girl started packing her stuff into her bag.

It was then when Yongsun's notification tone broke the calm of her mood, her heart suddenly hammering against her ribcage. Yujin raised an eyebrow at the sudden change in Byul's behavior, whose hand shot instantly to grab the phone and read the text. She made a mental note to ask her sister about it once she reached home, her smart eyes taking in the smitten smile that painted in Byul's face. 

"Is that your girlfriend, unnie?" Yujin asked suddenly, throwing her backpack over her shoulder, ready to go. Byul stiffened and quickly shot a startled look at her.

"What? No, I don't have a girlfriend, Yujin," Byul smiled faintly, shoving her phone inside the pocket of her pants. Yujin just shrugged, nonchalantly

“Then I hope you make a move on whoever texted you because damn unnie... you look whipped as heck," blush took over Byul's face in a second, she didn't expect to be teased by her friend's younger sister as well. 

"Yah, Ahn Yujin!" she narrowed her eyes at the younger girl, who just ran away before Byul could retaliate. 

"Thank you for the cards, unnie, I'll use them well! And you don't forget to text back!"

"Really, she is just like her sister..." Byul grunted once she was alone in her room, finally taking her phone out of her pocket to re-read Yongsun's text, her eyes devouring every word. " _It was such a nice surprise to see you today. How was your morning? A lot to study?_ "

Yongsun was a very straightforward person and she usually wasn't one to small talk on text, so this was a surprise for Byul. She went to her bed then, laying down comfortably before finally replying to the CEO. 

" _Yeah, I was studying a lot in the morning and then went with my friends to grab some lunch and coffee before tutoring Hyejin's sister. She just left. How was your day?_ " Byul found herself asking back, genuinely curious since she remembered Yongsun saying something about her day being awful at work.

" _Well, I just got out a very important meeting that had me going bonkers the whole week and it ended just I was expecting, successfully. Can I see you? I am about to leave the office._ " It was Yongsun's reply and a smile painted on Byul's face without her even noticing.

She was happy that the older girl was feeling accomplished, so she typed a fast, " _sure, just tell me once you are here and I will wait for you outside_ ," and the reply didn't take more than a few seconds to arrive, " _I'll be there in 15._ " And with that, their texting came to an end.

13 minutes later, Byul found herself outside of her dorm building, looking at the busy roads of mid afternoon Seoul in hopes to see Yongsun on her way. Which was really dumb of her, since the older girl seemed to have different cars. But there it was, the blue lambo taking her  attention as fast as the woman who drove it took her breath away. 

Yongsun parked right in front of her and, instead of opening the car door for Byul, she got out of the car herself. Byul followed with her eyes, a little confused, but too entranced by the sight of Yongsun to even care about how odd it was. The older girl was still wearing that bright blue suit and her button down white shirt, her jacket throw over her shoulder in a careless way and an easy smile on her lips that had Byul screaming internally. She was just too hot, it wasn't fair.

"Hi," Yongsun's smile was blinding and Byul found herself at ease and relaxed just by looking at her. 

"Hey there," Byul breathed out, forcing herself to take her gaze away from the CEO’s beautiful face and fix it on her car. "Where are you taking me today?" asked Byul and Yongsun just shrugged, taking a step closer to Byul so she could take one of her hands in her own, her thumbs drawing circles on the back of her hand. 

"I was thinking that today, maybe, we could just hang out in your place? If that isn't too much, I am just really tired to go out," oh. Well.

To say that Byul felt awkward was such an understatement. There, in the middle of her room, with Yongsun looking curiously at her surroundings, she just wanted earth to open and swallow her whole. Her room wasn't a mess, but she could see some pieces of clothing here and there  and, if you looked closely, you could even see a piece of underwear hidden under the desk. She grunted softly, cursing herself for being so careless and for assuming that Yongsun was going to take her out that night as well. 

Her train of thought was cut short when the older woman turned around to look at her, her soft smile still dancing on her lips, her long black mane falling flawlessly over her shoulders and her blue jacket tucked on her arm. 

"It isn't too big, but it feels homey; I like it," said Yongsun, and if the slight mess of her room caught her eye she didn't show it. Instead, she walked to the bed, leaving her jacket on top before crossing her arms over her chest while her eyes travelled over the panel full of pictures that was on the wall over the headboard, a new and softer gentle smile on her lips.

It was like watching a kaleidoscope of Byul's life, the pictures showing her development from a sweet and cute child to the amazing and gorgeous woman she became. Byul approached Yongsun, looking at the pictures as well, without being able to repress her own smile. 

"Who is that?" Asked Yongsun then, pointing to a particular picture of a group of friends. In the middle of the picture, Byul stood with her arms around some girl's waist, her face hidden in her neck in what was an obvious kiss. Byul cleared her throat slightly. 

"Those are my high school friends and that's my ex girlfriend, unnie," said Byul, looking at the picture for a second before looking back at Yongsun. The older woman just nodded her head, still looking at the picture.

"Do you still think about her?" she asked suddenly, turning her gaze towards Byul.

"Of course I do, she is one of my best friends. We had a good break up," she shrugged and moved to sit on her bed. Yongsun followed her movements with her eyes before sitting on the bed as well. 

"That's good to hear," she said. Byul looked at her then. 

"Do you think about your ex too?" she dared to ask, and Yongsun stiffened slightly, almost imperceptibly. 

"I don't have an ex, Byul," was what Yongsun said and Byul's right eyebrow shot up in an instant. "What do you mean? That's impossible, unnie... You are amazing and gorgeous and I doubt th-"

"I don't do relationships, that's all," she replied curtly, though a soft smile got painted on her lips at Byul's description of herself, "though I'm glad you think so highly of me," Yongsun's eyes were soft and warm and dark and Byul found herself without being able to look away and when she tried to say something, words got stuck in her throat. 

Yongsun didn't do relationships? What does that mean? Did it affect her somehow? Will it cause the older woman to get bored of her and turn her attention to someone else? And what about the money? It was too much and suddenly she felt kind of overwhelmed, her overthinking nature taking over.

Until Yongsun's soft and warm hand made contact with her cheek, pulling her out of the maze of her thoughts, "are you here? I lost you for a second there," said Yongsun, her thumb caressing Byul's cheekbone, softly, without any pressure. Byul nodded, forcing a small smile. 

"I am fine, unnie," she said before standing up with a small jump, which caught Yongsun by surprise, "do you want to watch a movie?" Byul asked, walking to her desk to grab her laptop and to dim down the light of her room. Yongsun nodded as well, not being able to refuse since the younger woman took her laptop even before she could answer.

Once Byul was back on the bed, she arranged the pillows against the headboard and leaned her back on them. Yongsun looked at her with a curious smile before doing the same, resting her legs on the bed, her toes moving in her white socks.

"Is there something you wanna watch, unnie?" Byul asked, looking down at Yongsun before looking back at the screen. Yongsun just shrugged. 

"I don't mind, whatever you want."

"I kind of want to rewatch Moulin Rouge..." muttered Byul, looking at Yongsun for confirmation. The older woman just smiled in response, "also how was your meeting? You told me it went well, but didn't give me any detail." Yongsun grunted for a second, remembering the meeting that elongated more hours than what she expected; she was sure that was the reason her back was killing her at that moment. 

"It went well, though it got too long... But the important thing is that we signed a contract with a new laboratory for a new set of products. Which is great and also means a big influx of money in the future if everything goes well," Yongsun shrugged again, looking up at Byul, who was already looking at her with a tender smile on her lips. 

"I am proud of you, Yongsun unnie," said Byul before looking back at the screen, blush seizing her cheeks and crawling up her neck. 

Yongsun blinked a few times, her gaze still fixed on the younger girl's side profile and feeling her heart fluttering in her chest; it was the first time she received those words from someone and their effects were devastating. Yongsun could only stare at Byul while her heart hammered in her eardrums. Until the younger woman's gaze found her brown irises again; Byul's eyes had a warm and special glint to them, one that told Yongsun that she was being genuine and she really didn't know what to feel and what to do with her emotions at all. 

So she just decided to do what she does best; she cleared her throat and got comfortable, pushing all those thoughts at the back of her mind, her attention on the screen, but still both of them perfectly aware of the body next to them and the faint touch of their hands over the bed. 

The first minutes went by smoothly, but as the air in the room started to get warmer and denser by the proximity and the heat of the laptop, Yongsun started to sweat, as she was still clad in her work clothes. She adjusted her position on the bed and with a huff, she unbuttoned the three top buttons of her shirt. 

And suddenly a violent cough filled the room as Byul's flaming red face hid behind one of her hands, completely flustered. Yongsun looked at her then, recognizing not only the look of her face, but being able to see how Byul's eyes weren't able to look away for the newly exposed skin of her chest.

"Like what you see, Byul-ah?" Yongsun's voice dropped an octave and Byul's breath hitched in her throat; the sound didn't go unnoticed to Yongsun, who widened a smirk, "I'll take that as a yes."

"Unnie, please, close your buttons..." said Byul in almost a whisper, forcing her gaze to fix on the screen, where the main characters finally met. 

"I don't want to, I'm hot," Yongsun replied back and Byul closed her eyes tightly because, 𝘰𝘩, she knew that, "also..." continued Yongsun, "I want you to look at me, Byul," her voice was sultry, her attention now completely on the younger girl who squirmed flustered next to her on the bed. Yongsun turned to her then and Byul started to feel herself about to panic, "it makes me feel good when you look at me."

Byul was sure that her face was about to melt, she was blushing just too much and, though she was looking straight at the screen, her brain wasn't registering what was happening in the movie; she was painfully aware of every movement Yongsun made and the burning of her stare.

"Byul... Look at me," Yongsun's tone became more demanding and Byul could only oblige, her gaze fixed now on Yongsun's blown and hazy pupils. Yongsun's feline smile widened then, her own stare falling to Byul's lips and her breath was caught in her throat once again.

She wanted to kiss her, she wanted to kiss Yongsun so badly that even her lips hurt, demanding it. But her past words resonated in her mind, rendering her unable of doing anything at all. Unable of doing anything that wasn't looking at her and getting lost in her cloudy eyes.

Until it was Yongsun herself the one who started closing the distance between them and then, Byul just stopped functioning; her brain in overdrive and her heart beating so hard she was sure it was gonna bruise. She could only close her eyes and wait for the collision.

Yongsun breathed out, slowly, letting it hit softly over Byul's parted and expectant lips. It made the younger girl shudder with the smallest whimper. Yongsun stopped at the last second, her eyes tracing every feature of Byul's face and dropping finally to her mouth.

She didn't kiss, she told herself, and using an amount of willpower bigger than expected, she lifted her face enough to let her lips land on the sharp tip of Byul's nose. Byul's heart skipped a beat then, but it wasn't a pleasant sensation at all. It was laced with disappointment and a slight anger at herself for letting her thoughts to hope for too much. 

So she opened her eyes and her gaze met Yongsun's clouded pupils before the older girl could hide her face in the hollow of her neck, again peppering her hot and smooth skin with wet kisses and hungry bites. 

Against her own will, a strangled noise escaped her lips and one of her hands found its way to the back of Yongsun's head, her fingers digging into her long dark mane in an attempt of bringing her close to her skin, inviting her to get lost in the valley of her neck. Yongsun obliged with a sound of satisfaction that was born at the back of her throat, a grunt that made Byul's skin to bristle, a sensation that became almost deliciously painful when Yongsun's arms went around her waist and her hands drifted under her shirt.

Yongsun's hands were hot, too hot, and they lit flames on every centimeter of skin they traced with their fingertips; or maybe it was her own body the one burning, as she could only feel smoke and heat eating her from inside, ignited by something as simple as a caress and some kisses. 

Byul was fucked, she realized then; and it made her feel extremely vulnerable. Because suddenly Yongsun was everywhere, she clogged each of her senses and made them focus on herself in her own accord. 

"You are so fucking soft, Byul," Yongsun's voice, dangerously low, whispered against the already wet skin of her neck, her head dropping until her sharp teeth nibbled at her collarbones, her shirt having been ridden down until leaving them exposed. Byul choked a new whimper, her hands tugging around Yongsun's mane and over the sheets.

"I want to touch your everywhere, until my hands get so used to your skin that they stop to feel its touch," Yongsun growled this time, her face resurfacing from her neck, pupils wide, eyes burning and lips swollen, "that way I will have to touch you even more to learn it again."

Byul's chest heaved with a with a deep sigh, ragged breathing that wasn't enough to feed her lungs and they almost stopped to function when suddenly Yongsun straddled her; all messy hair and wildness in her eyes. She really wanted to give in at the moment.

And she almost did, but as her own cloudy eyes dropped to Yongsun's lips and, entranced, she leaned so slightly towards her, the older woman recoiled just as slightly; and just like that, the veil of desire vanished, consumed by its own and desperate flames. Don't give in.

It was hard, fighting her own instincts; but for Yongsun it was a game and for her it was business and that's something she shouldn't forget, no matter how much she wanted to get fucked into oblivion. That's why, when Yongsun's teeth bared as she leaned back in and her hands tried to make their way to the button of Byul's pants, the younger woman’s hands shot straight to her wrists, something that made the older woman to stop in a heartbeat.

A question swam in Yongsun's eyes, which found Byul's vulnerable ones in search of answers. Yongsun's hands dropped then and she was off Byul a second later, standing next to the bed, her breath still erratic. The younger woman followed each movement, hair disheveled and shirt as messy as her own emotions, everything reflected in those brown eyes that didn’t stop staring and Yongsun could only hiss softly, lowly, her instincts kicking in; she needed to yeet the fuck out of that room. 

And so she did; she was a confident woman and no girl would ever change that. She always had everything under control, or that she wanted to think. So she took her jacket from the bed and, with one last glance towards Byul, who was still immobile on the bed, she headed towards the door.

"I'll text you," was all she said before stepping outside and closing the door right behind. Byul didn't move for a couple of seconds, just listening intently, her heart shrinking painfully for an instant when she felt the weight of Yongsun's body leaning on the door. It wasn't until she listened to the sound of her heels drifting away on the corridors of her dorm that she allowed herself to breathe.

The gorgeous soundtrack of Moulin Rouge was still playing as background music just as Byul rolled over until she laid on her side and made a ball out of herself. And then she cried, completely overwhelmed by her own emotions; the want, the frustration, the confusion and something else kicking at the back of her mind took over her whole system and then tried to leave her in form of wild hot tears that burned her cheeks. Exhaustion took her consciousness hours later into a dreamless sleep, where her unfulfilled desires couldn't reach her. 

When she woke up the next morning to a bank notification signaling the deposit of a second huge amount of money in her new shared account, a bitter taste seized her mouth. Perhaps this was a situation she wasn't as ready for as she thought. Perhaps, after all, it was a bad idea.


	7. Chapter 7.

Mondays are, universally speaking, the most dreaded day of the week; just because they break the peace of the weekend and open a new week of strenuous working hours. But not for Yongsun. Her most despised day is the Tuesday; slow Tuesdays that slither lazily and which hours don't pass quick enough. 

Mondays suck too, but for Yongsun they weren't the greatest evil, they were a beginning while Tuesday was just... there, existing and solely for that, they were enough to annoy her just as she gets out of bed. Wednesdays were cool, the equator of the week and only for that they got a pass. Thursday was a day that symbolized anticipation and Fridays were a relief. All of them served a purpose, but Tuesdays? Tuesdays suck. 

"I fucking hate Tuesdays," Yongsun muttered, alone in her office, her gaze fixed on the screen of her computer while her fingers moved restlessly over the keyboard, typing some important documents. 

Tuesdays were slow and tiring and that Tuesday in particular wasn't an exception. She sighed for the nth time that day, her hand going up to the knot of her tie to pull it a little in an attempt of getting more comfortable. She was sure she has been almost 6 hours in the office already, but unlucky her, it has been only 3. Time dragged and seconds melted and Yongsun just wanted to leave and get some coffee before going home, maybe play some piano and take a long bath with a glass of her finest wine, she deserved it. Maybe she could also text certain blonde and ask her to meet, she would certainly love that

Her fingers stopped their movement over the keyboard, eyes blinking trying to regain their focus on the screen. Then she slapped herself, the sound of her hand hitting her cheek travelling all over the room before it flew again towards the delete key, pressing it enough times to erase the big and bold **MOON BYULYI** her fingers left on the document. She really needed some wine.

Maybe getting wasted on expensive wine and bubbles could be enough to tear Byul out of her thoughts. It's been days since she saw her for the last time, the image of her disheveled self open and vulnerable and yearning on her bed haunting her at the back of her mind since then.

Yongsun leaned back on her chair, her hands going all the way to her temples to massage the impending migraine out of them. She then took her phone out of the pocket of her jacket, her thumbs opening Byul's chat before she could help it somehow. 

" _Thank you for the money_ ," was Byul's last message and she didn't bother replying to it back then, days ago, when after an impulse she made an even bigger deposit in their shared account. Why did she do that? She wasn't sure, but as the broken gaze of Moon Byulyi kept on blinking away her coherent thinking, she couldn't think about a single reason not to do it. 

Money solves everything, that's what she was taught since she was a child, and maybe she just wanted money to solve whatever the fuck this was, to solve the crazy fluttering of her heart and its crazy hammering in her ears. She wanted them gone and dead but every time Byul appeared on her mind, she wasn't as sure if some money was enough to make them disappear.

Yongsun sighed and dropped her phone on her table, hiding her face behind her palms then, suddenly too tired to even type. The door of her office opened at that moment and her secretary came inside, closing once in. 

"Sorry to bother you, Yongsun, but I got a message from your father," a growl of agony could be heard from Yongsun and her secretary smiled sympathetically.

"Give me a second, Eunbi, I need to prepare for this," was all Yongsun said and Eunbi laughed internally, already used to her boss actions whenever her father was involved. 

"Sure thing." 15 good seconds later, Yongsun raised her head, looking at her secretary with a little smile.

"I'm ready, please, pull the trigger and end my suffering," Yongsun said, taking her right hand to her chest, grabbing her shirt over her heart, and Eunbi could only roll her eyes at the gesture.

"You are so silly, god... Anyway, he just wants to remind you that the company annual party will be held in a few weeks-" Eunbi stopped herself then just to go through her phone, looking at the calendar, "in three weeks, the saturday, to be exact," Yongsun's blood ran cold, she completely forgot about that stupid party, "he also wants me to remind you that you MUST!!-" she cleared her throat after exclaiming, "sorry, he asked me to made that point clear- that you must bring a date, a real date so "Eunbi you are out of the menu", and that he hopes that the prostitute scene of last year won't happen again," Eunbi said with an amused smile, a smile that grew when she saw her boss and friend almost banging her head on top of the sturdy wood of her table. 

"Why are you off the menu? You are my best friend, why can't you be my date?" Yongsun complained and Eunbi could only laugh, coming closer to her boss while shrugging. 

"I'm sorry, Yong, but I'm part of the company, I'm already going to the party and I already have someone to ask to come with me. Just try not to pick some street woman to bring, we don't want your dad to suffer a cardiac arrest, don't we?" Yongsun grunted in response. 

"Speak for yourself!" Eunbi laughed loudly, patting her friends back. 

"Lunch time is soon, will you join me or will you leave me alone today too?" Yongsun looked up at Eunbi, a soft smile painting on her lips; it was true that it's been days since she spent proper time with her friend, and that's something she could fix. 

"I'll join you, I'll take you out. I've been dying to go to that gourmet burger place you told me about," Eunbi smiled softly, nodding.

“Great, I'll see you in a few hours. And finish those documents already, damn it!" She said before leaving, avoiding skillfully the pen Yongsun threw at her. 

Once the door closed again, Yongsun leaned back into her chair, a new sigh slipping between her lips. Her thoughts got clouded again of blonde hair and soft skin and deep broken eyes and before she could stop herself, her hand reached for her phone, opening Byul's chat again. 

" _Three weeks from now, Saturday, clear the night for me._ " She hit send before stopping to think about it. And after considering for half a second, she typed again, " _are you free tonight as well?_ "

The reply came short and fast, " _okay, and yes, i am_ ", and Yongsun's stomach clenched at the prospect of seeing Byul again; still with the desire of killing off the bubbling new-born emotions that she refused to acknowledge, and trembling in fear of these broken dark eyes.

* * *

Afternoon dragged the sun in its way to set later into the day. There were still a few hours at the office, but after a much needed lunch with Eunbi, Yongsun came back with her batteries fully charged and, before than expected, she finished her duties for the day. She might as well leave early. What to do? was her train of thoughts at that moment. 

Spinning on her chair, she played with the tips of some strands of her hair, the thumb of her other hand caressing the screen of her phone. She had texted Byul before and the younger girl told her she was going to be all day at her dorm room. Her thumb unlocked her phone next, her chair stopping its movements once her heels met the carpeted floor. She opened Byul's chat just as she rose from the chair, sending a quick message, " _I'll be there in 15._ "

Yongsun then left the office, her hands patting the the fabric of her tight skirt in case there were wrinkles; for sure she didn't want her subordinates and juniors to see her in a way other than perfect and charming, though she knew that deep down she was far from that.

"Eunbi, I'm leaving early, can you handle what's left?" She asked her friend once she stopped next to her desk, a soft smile on her face. Eunbi smiled back at her, nodding. 

"Yeah, don't worry. I just need to print and distribute some documents and send some emails."

"Good, you can go home after that. See you tomorrow," said Yongsun and, with a small wave, she bid farewell to her best friend, who reciprocated the gesture before diving back into work. 

Yongsun got into the elevator then, looking at Eunbi until the doors closed and then, she took out her phone again only to be welcomed by some work emails notification, but no new messages from Byul. Yongsun frowned, the dark claws of anxiety starting to grip her stomach. She let it go for now, ignoring the best she could said emotion.

She got out of the elevator, and still there was no answer. She got out of the building, and still there was no answer. She got in her blue lambo and still there was no answer. Even when she got caught in a red light, still there was no answer. And the claws closed tight.

When 20 minutes later, due to traffic, Yongsun reached Byul's dorm, she checked her phone. Nothing. So she texted again, a simple, "I'm here, Byul." And the seconds became a minute and minutes toppled again and again and suddenly she felt that it's been hours since she was stuck  there, inside her car. 

She definitely hated being ignored, she hated when people made her wait and she could feel her temper rising like bile up her throat and she was determined to give Moon Byulyi a piece of her mind if she didn't have a good excuse; after all she was paying her, she basically was her employer and it was their agreement to meet whenever she requested if it didn't clash with Byul's studies. And Byul gave her green fucking light today, why the fuck was she being ignored then? Each second was like a new flame igniting in her chest.

Oh, man, she was pissed off. 

Then she left the car, taking her leather jacket with her, all danger and fire and in her eyes and she went all the way into Byul's dorm. She already knew the way, anyways. Her strides were resolute and confident, the heels making their distinct sound over the concrete floor. It was when she entered Byul's dorm corridor that her steps started to waver and when she reached Byul's door she stopped in her tracks. 

She needed a moment, that's for sure. She was angry, but she couldn't forget how awkward her interactions with the younger girl were after she left the room in a haste that fateful day. She couldn't forget the broken look in her pupils, not the softness of her skin and 𝘰𝘩 𝘎𝘰𝘥, she really was going mad because the amount of contradictory emotions that Byul provoked in her was something she really didn't appreciate. 

Her dark gaze fell on the wooden door, eyes softening while her thoughts drifted to Byul peacefully sleeping on her bed under the glow of the golden hour. Yeah, that's for sure what was happening at that moment, that she was taking a nap. And Yongsun was about to turn around and just go home to rest and let the younger girl do the same when a piercing panicked scream came from Byul's room. 

Yongsun’s heart almost leaped from her mouth and she opened the door so fast and hard that she almost tore it from the wall. Only to find a scenario that she wasn't expecting.

Infinite amount of newspaper pages were scattered over the floor of the room, covering every inch of the burgundy carpet that she remembered she stepped on when she was there days ago Instead, the long lost news served as protection against paint of every colour and shade and,  right in the middle of the room, there was a canvas with a gorgeous landscape that she couldn't even appreciate properly because all her attention was on the bed and the two people that looked straight at her from there with a variety of expressions that she couldn't register.

YongSun blinked, and slowly, almost painfully, she let her breath go. Byul laid on her bed, disheveled blonde hair and paint stains all over her face and arms and thighs and the expanse of skin of her abdomen that was available to the eye, her shirt being ridden up after what  seemed to be some physical struggle. 

That was not the reason the dark claws closed tightly on Yongsun's stomach, clogging her senses in white; it was the hand shape of the stains and the familiarity in which those very same palms were pressed on Byul's upper abdomen, fingers gripping at skin that her own fingertips ached to touch again. 

Her mind was fog and smoke and Yongsun was sure she was about to stop breathing. Her heated gaze moved up those arms, appreciating the toned muscle until she reached a face framed by black locks and dark eyes staring back at her with a small frown. Yongsun then took notice of her legs, one of the girl's thighs dangerously close to Byul in a way that had Yongsun almost vibrating in anger; and it was again the familiarity of the position, the relaxed way on which Byul's arms hung over the girl's shoulders what triggered that reaction on Yongsun. And she hated it. 

But then she understood the reason when her gaze fell on the panel full of pictures that was over the headboard of the bed, eyes drilling holes on the picture where Byul embraced her highschool girlfriend; the very same girl that was on top of her on the bed at that very moment. And she hated it even more. 

Her hands closed in tight fists over the leather of her jacket, her breathing getting ragged by the minute. She wanted to leave, but her heels didn't want to move. And the silence broke.

"Who are you?" Asked the girl and at the very same moment, her name scaped Byul's lips, "Yongsun unnie? What are you doing here?" she asked, gently pushing the girl off her to sit properly on the bed, covering her paint stained skin when she fixed her clothes. 

The girl looked at Byul for a moment before fixing her stare back on Yongsun. Yongsun stared back, and what the girl had to see in her dark eyes had to be hostile and dangerous because she flinched and took a step away from Byul, who looked at her with a question in her eyes. 

"I sent you a text." Was all Yongsun said, voice cold and without inflection and Byul's head turned sharply towards the older woman. "I asked you if you were free and you said yes. Then I texted you to tell you I was coming. You never replied and I was worried," Yongsun tried to control the bite of her tone, the shaking of her hands, but she was even starting to sweat at that point; her icy glare turned to the girl one last time before fixing on Byul's confused eyes, "now I know I shouldn't have, sorry I'm bothering you. I'll leave." 

Byul opened her mouth to talk back then, but the girl beat her to it, taking an uncertain step towards Yongsun.

"Please, don't leave! We were just playing around after painting, I was about to leave anyway," the girl offered her best smile as well as her hand for a handshake, her eyes turning into crescents, "I'm Kang Seulgi, by the way, nice to meet you, huh-..?"

"Kim Yongsun," was all she replied, her voice still ice cold. Seulgi cleared her throat, taking the hand she extended towards Yongsun to rub her neck when the older woman didn't return the gesture. 

"Yeah, sure... Well, Byul-ah, I better go. Can I please leave the painting here? I bet it will be dry tomorrow. I'll treat you to that barbecue place you like so much in return," Yongsun's frown deepened, eyes sharp that Byul didn't understand at all.

"Oh, you said that, you can't back down now," laughed Byul, standing up from the bed, "now go and take a shower, you stink!" Seulgi smiled fondly at Byul, and the gesture didn't go unnoticed by Yongsun, who almost let out a growl when the youngest of the three left a soft kiss on Byul's cheek before leaving. 

"Nice to miss you, ma'am," was all she said to her and, finally, she got lost in the corridor and Yongsun could finally breathe. 

"Yongsun unnie?" said Byul, voice soft and gentle and Yongsun stiffened, her eyes travelling all the way to the younger girl's face, who looked at her with worry in her eyes. And if Yongsun's heart jumped in her chest, she wouldn't ever admit it, "are you okay?" she asked and the tension and the anger vanished in a second, and her body relaxed and there only was the white pain of confusion and a feeling of being so overwhelmed by emotions that rendered speechless for a long couple of seconds.

Seconds that dragged and elongated and in which Byul's stare grew hazier in worry and suddenly it was too much and Yongsun could definitely kill for a glass of wine right there, right then. So she just exhaled slowly and, softly, she said; "take a shower, we are going out."


	8. Chapter 8.

Almost one hour later, Byul found herself sitting inside Yongsun's blue lambo, the older woman's tense figure sitting on the driver seat, with white knuckles gripping the steering wheel. Byul inhaled deeply, her gaze fixing on Yongsun's side profile, whose own gaze was focused on the road. 

The sun was setting and its soft glow tore golden bolts of light from the surface of the river, which could be seen not too far. Her own hands were clasped over her lap, thumbs nervously playing with one another. She wanted to speak up, but the air was too charged and too thick and she really didn't know what to say. 

Yongsun's icy demeanor back in her room rendered her speechless and her animosity towards Seulgi was something she was still trying to wrap her head around. Was she angry? And why? A bad day at work? Her texts being ignored? Byul fidgeted on the passenger seat, finally exhaling the air she kept in her lungs before finally breaking the silence.

"So... you met Seulgi," was what she said and Yongsun stiffened on her seat, her jaw locking tightly for a couple of long seconds before relaxing, "that I did.”

"Yeah... She is my-" Yongsun cut her then, "your girlfriend, I know. I am good with faces," Yongsun's tone dropped a few degrees, the cold slipping between her words to finally vanish into thin air with a sigh. Byul frowned. 

"She is not my girlfriend, she is just my ex, unnie."

"It didn't look like it, though," said Yongsun then and Byul understood her thoughts because, well... Their position when the older woman barged in the room was pretty... awkward, to say the least. Blushing at the thought, Byul shook her head a few times, enforcing her words.

"We are just close, she is one of my best friends! And also she is like a kid, once she gets paint on her hands she unleashes the beast, you know... Art kids," Byul rolled her eyes with nonchalance, one of the corners of her mouth rising in a small smile. Yongsun's knuckles lost their whiteness when she relaxed her grip on the steering wheel, though the slight distant expression of her face didn't waver. 

"She is into you, though," was all she said and Byul physically gaped at her. 

"No way, that's impossible, she has a girlfriend," for the first time, Yongsun tore her gaze off the road to look at Byul for a split second. 

"Ah, does she now? Interesting," she replied and Byul could only nod before the older woman's gaze went back to the road. 

"Yeah, a business major called Joohyun, they have been dating for a while now," Yongsun hummed as response and Byul decided it was time to drop the topic, her mind working at full power in its task to understand the convoluted existence that was Kim Yongsun and those strange mood swings of hers, "where are you taking me?" Asked Byul then and, instead of answering her, Yongsun just parked the car in front of a very large and very expensive-looking apartment building. 

Byul looked up at the building, taking in the fancy front and entrance before looking back at Yongsun. The older woman was slumped against the back of the seat, eyes tightly closed and, before she could say a thing, Yongsun moved and unfastened both seat belts, a small sweet smile that didn't really reach her eyes appearing on her lips. 

"I'm taking you home, for a while," and while her voice was devoid of any teasing subtone and in her words there was no innuendo or sexual suggestion, Byul's face painted deep red in a furious blush. 

"Home? Do you live here?" was what she asked and Yongsun just shrugged before getting out of the car.

"Sometimes, I do," Byul followed her a second later, taking her hoodie with her. 

"Sometimes?" Yongsun just shrugged again, her steps taking her into the elegant building and, once inside, Byul could only marvel at the design. 

She followed Yongsun like a puppy following its owner all the way into the elevator and up the 13th floor. And just right behind a sturdy door, a luxurious penthouse opened in front of her. She didn't even had time to express her astonishment to the older woman, since her focus was stolen by her when Yongsun started to get rid of the leather jacket she was wearing; a tight white blouse drawing ever curve and edge and an equally tight pencil skirt adjusting to her hips and legs like a second skin. Her mouth felt like sandpaper. 

Yongsun looked up at her, signaling with a movement of her head towards the large living room, where a dark couch was waiting for them. 

"Feel like at home, get comfortable and I'll bring something to drink, fancy some wine?" Yongsun asked before disappearing behind a door, in what she supposed was the kitchen. Byul could breathe again after the woman left her sights. 

"Wine is fine, thank you," and even though she was told to get comfortable, she just couldn't. Everything was too expensive and too... much, for her to feel like at home. 

Yongsun came back with two glasses of wine and finally sat down next to her, her right leg crossed over the left and one of her arms landing on top of the back of the couch. Byul could only stare at her and drink in the amazing view just as she took the first sip of the very fine red wine.

"So... what will happen in three weeks?" asked Byul, trying her hardest not to let the conversation to become awkward, what happened the last two times Yongsun was on her room very present in her mind, still. Yongsun grunted then, eyes closing in resignation. 

"A company party. I have to bring someone and I... I thought about you," she said and then looked at her with such softness in her eyes that Byul just wanted to lean in a kiss it away. But she didn't.

"Oh, a party... Parties are nice, but I don't see you excited about it, at all," Yongsun cracked a very small smile and shrugged once again. 

"Because I am not, I hate it. Too many people and all of them fake as fuck," she took a long sip of her drink before setting her glass on the small table next to the couch, "we are going to go shopping later this week, though. We gotta make you the prettiest woman that party has ever seen," she said then, the tone of her voice sweet and velvety and Byul was about to explode right there.

"But I can't pay for it, unnie..." Yongsun's eyebrow rose slightly and Byul continued talking, "and yeah, I know you gave me a lot of money, but most of it... I already used it to pay my parent's debt, I'm sorry..." Yongsun's eyebrow rose even more, one of her hands flying to lay on top of Byul's, giving it a light squeeze.

“Who asked you to pay? Everything is on me, I invited you. And even if I didn't, I will still pay for it," her thumb started to leave soft caresses over Byul's knuckles and the younger girl's gaze fell on their joined hands, just for a second, just to rejoice on the touch of Yongsun's warm skin on hers. Then her eyes went back to Yongsun's dark pupils, finding her already staring back at her and, for a moment, she was lost of words; lost in the turmoil of emotions that took over her chest.

"I am sorry I ignored your texts, unnie... I was helping Seulgi with her art project and I kind of forgot and my phone was on mute," she felt the need to explain herself and Yongsun was just caressing her hand in that comforting manner and she was so aware of everything, suddenly.

"It's fine, I guess I was just worried... I was about to leave your dorm when you screamed, but I just panicked then and I guess... I wasn't expecting to see what I found," Yongsun's voice seemed distant, and her pupils turned hazy for a second, getting lost in the memory.

The caresses stopped then and Byul dropped her gaze again to their hands to see how the older woman started pulling away her hand. Before she could stop herself, she took Yongsun's hand in her own, being her turn to caress the older woman's soft skin now. The glint of surprise in  Yongsun's eyes was very welcomed, and she found in herself enough confidence to ask. 

"Were you jealous of Seulgi? Of whatever you imagined that was happening?" she asked, boldly, and Yongsun's body stiffened so hard that even her hand trapped between Byul's seemed to freeze.

"... yes," Yongsun said then, firm and unreadable gaze drilling into Byul's and the younger woman’s breath hitched, "yes, I was jealous, I was so incredibly jealous I felt I could grab that poor girl by the hair and drag her out of your room," the bite was back in Yongsun's voice  and Byul's skin bristled helplessly. 

"But why, unnie?" Yongsun's gaze hardened then, trying to pull her hand away only to get it grasped even more tightly by Byul's.

"Because in my mind she was doing to you all the things I want to do," Yongsun's eyes were dark and unwavering, fixed on Byul's face like she was reading an open book and Byul was sure that it was what she was like at that moment. 

She already knew how much the older woman wanted her, but hearing it again after so many days was devastating and she felt the stupid way her heart speeded up. It was ridiculous how much she affected her. Yongsun's hand slipping away from her grasp took her out of her reverie, her confused gaze finding again those deep pools of darkness staring back at her. 

"But I understood the last time that you don't want the same, so I will stop insisting," Yongsun said then, taking again her glass of wine to take a new sip, "you don't have to worry about that anymore, Byul," the younger girl's eyes opened wide because holy shit, Yongsun couldn't be more mistaken. And before even reflecting about her actions, Byul straddled Yongsun.

The older woman gasped at the bold movement and her glass of wine almost slipped off her fingers, though she gripped it at the very last second to finally leave it again on the table. Blush seized Byul's face, the wave of red ascending through her neck until the tip of her ears.

Her voice was timid, soft; Yongsun almost couldn't hear her. 

"That's not it, unnie." Yongsun's hands were on top of the couch, in a painful attempt of not to touch her, fingers digging on the dark fabric of the couch. 

"What did you say, Byul-ah?" she asked, tone gentle and sweet.

"I said that that's not true, unnie," Byul's voice was firmer this time, though it wavered at the edges, threatening to crumble under the weight of her shyness. Yongsun lifted one hand then, guiding it to Byul's face to cup her cheek, her thumb caressing her cheekbone, slowly.

"Then why did you stopped me the last time?" Asked Yongsun because she needed to know, it was driving her crazy. Byul breathed in, deeply, her eyes closing to avoid looking at Yongsun's face. 

"Because I'm scared, unnie..." she admited, breathing out a sigh and feeling how the weight of the whole world was lifted of her shoulders; a dam opened and the words couldn't be stopped, "I'm scared of you getting bored of me after getting what you want, I'm scared of you giving your time to other person... I'm scared of you, unnie."

For once, it was Yongsun the one that was rendered speechless, speechless over the younger girl's fragility and insecurities, speechless over the butterflies that twisted and fluttered in her stomach. She really wanted to vomit them, they were getting annoying.

Instead, she leaned in, caressing the tip of Byul's nose with her own before leaving a soft kiss on her cheek, her words muffled against the soft and hot flushed skin.

"There is no way in hell I could get bored of you, Byul-ah... there is so much in you to explore that I think I'll die before I get to discover the last of your mysteries," she felt how the younger girl's hands travelled to her wrists, and her gaze was drawn towards Byul's blown pupils, fog and smoke burning behind their surface and chest heaving in irregular breaths that hit her face.

Byul took Yongsun's hands around her body in a hug and it didn't take long for Yongsun's arms to wrap around Byul's slim waist. Skin was burning and all of Byul's inhibitions went straight to hell the moment she breathlessly said... 

"Unnie... please... take me to your room."


	9. Chapter 9.

The way to Yongsun’s room was silent and the air between them was dense, tension so thick that it could be sliced with a knife; and when finally the door of the room closed behind their backs, it exploded. Yongsun felt on edge, her skin bristled in a silent demand of closing the distance with Byul and just touch her just the way she wished.

Byul looked around for a while, her gaze falling on the big bed that dominated the whole room for a second too long before her eyes drifted again to the tense being that was Kim Yongsun, who was leaning against the closed door.

Their eyes met, all blown pupils and fog of desire dancing in dark irises and the air between them became even more congested. Yongsun moved from the door then, taking firm but small steps towards Byul and, once next to her, her hands travelled all the way down to take the younger girl’s hands in a reassuring squeeze; they were there because of Byul’s request, but she could as well take it back at any time.

Byul squeezed Yongsun’s hands back and, exhaling a deep breath, she let her gaze to wander and just to take the older woman in. Yongsun’s chest heaved, and her clouded eyes were fixed constantly on Byul’s face while the younger woman studied her. Byul’s eyes traced every feature of her face, while her own heated up because of Yongsun’s unwavering stare; no matter how composed she tried to appear in front of her, the truth is that she was about to melt under all that heat.

Her hands then left Yongsun’s, and slightly shaky, they started a way up the older woman’s shirt, undoing every button they found in their path. Tension was growing thicker by the second, blush taking over Byul’s face like a wave with every centimeter of skin that was revealed in front of her; silence suffocating. The shirt fell with a flutter of fabric and warm air and Byul’s long hands, kind of sweaty and not as stable as she wished they were, came into contact with Yongsun’s soft skin, marveling at the hard muscle underneath; her fingers tracing non-sensical lines over her abdomen. Yongsun’s eyes closed with a sigh, her skin bristling even more aggressively because of the attention.

“You are so damn hard, unnie…” Byul’s voice was low and laced with need and wonder, her fingertips discovering every inch of skin on their way to the edge of a bra that to Yongsun felt way too constricting at that time. Still, a small smirk painted on the older woman’s lips, eyes opening in a hazy stare that drilled into Byul’s pupils. “I do pole dance,” she said, matter of factly, and Byul’s gaze snapped upwards just to find Yongsun staring already back at her. Her breath hitched at the mental image and a low grunt emerged from her throat. “Jesus fucking christ.”

Yongsun laughed softly, the sound as dark as her own desires and, finally, her hands jumped into motion, mirroring Byul’s hands in their new task of getting rid of her shirt. Her fingers gripped the fabric and, not as slow or gentle as she would have wanted, she took it off the younger woman’s body. Her stare was hungry over Byul’s body and the taller one felt that she was about to turn into ashes under all that heat and fire that radiated from Yongsun’s blown pupils.

Fire was what got lit up on her skin the moment Yongsun’s arms curled around her body, chests flushed against one another and there, under the soft golden glow of the street lights breaking the darkness of the room, Byul could even count Yongsun’s eyelashes and every tiny freckle that cursed the bridge of her nose. Oxygen left her lungs right then, just like if someone had punched her; someone named Kim Yongsun, and whose beauty had a pretty mean fist.

And she was drowning, light-headed and without the ability to inhale; she was just able to feel the contact, to feel the demand of her skin to be touched, and on god, she was craving for it.

And then Yongsun’s skillful hands got rid of the clasp of her bra and the piece of clothing didn’t take more than a couple of seconds to fall to the floor and Byul was dizzy as the harsh touch of Yongsun’s bra against her now bare breasts, nipples more than hardened and demanding of attention, sent her mind into overdrive and her body into a massive flame.

Yongsun’s stare was intoxicating, and Byul was trapped; she couldn’t look away. Her heart jumped in her chest and it thundered in her ears and sometimes it seemed that it was the only thing Byul could hear. Until Yongsun’s hands traveled down her back and her heart turned the mute on, suddenly only hyperaware of everything Yongsun; the rough and sharp caress of her short nails on the delicate skin of her lower back, the way her fingers gripped at the soft flesh of her sides, making her back to arch against her, pressing their bodies even further, breaths mingling and mixing and so close to a kiss that Byul could already taste it on her own lips, desperate gaze now trained on Yongsun’s parted mouth.

But then Yongsun’s hand moved again, long fingers finding the button of her pants and before she could realize, before the information traveled through the dense cloud of fog of her mind, the piece of clothing pooled down at her ankles. The air of the room hit her naked skin, but she felt so warm, Yongsun was so warm, everything was so warm and so overwhelming that it really didn’t make a difference.

The older woman took a step back then, letting her gaze to travel down Byul’s lean and thin body, taking in every detail and every little mole and mark she could find. She was entranced, just as if she needed to memorize with her eyes before she could give her hands the same privilege.

“You are so…” Yongsun lost track of her own words, a deep sigh that sounded suspiciously close to a growl scaping her throat, “ _God-.._ ” and as soon as she took a step back, Yongsun was again glued to her body and Byul emitted a breathy moan at the contact of Yongsun’s hot and demanding lips against the delicate skin of her neck. Her arms curled around Yongsun’s body while the older woman feasted on her flesh, one of her hands burying itself between wild dark locks, inviting her to go deeper and hungrier. She wanted to be consumed in her entirety.

Yongsun started making her way towards the bed, dragging Byul with her as her lips kept drawing kisses and angry bites on soft wet skin and when the edge of the bed came into contact with the back of her legs, she turned around, almost pushing the younger girl on top of the comfortable mattress. Her chest was heaving with ragged breathing and their gazes locked in a heated battle that ended when Byul looked down just as Yongsun started getting rid of her tight skirt. Her strong legs were left on full display and the younger woman’s jaw fell slack at the vision of Yongsun in a set of black lingerie that sent her mind reeling into chaos.

Byul wanted to say something, to share with Yongsun one of the many compliments that swarmed her mind, but her tongue was tied and only a desperate grunt of impatience could be heard; hands aching and fingers burning. Yongsun smirked then, all white and sharp teeth that bared almost menacingly, because she had the younger girl wrapped around her finger and it made her feel extremely powerful.

She straddled her then, foreheads pressed against each other and hot glistening skin rubbing there where their bodies came into contact. Byul’s big calloused hands gripped at Yongsun’s ass, pulling her impossibly closer; her misty pupils fixed on parted lips and a feline smile.

Byul felt her heart about to leave her through her mouth to just take a run over the room, the vital organ beating so hard she was sure it was going to bruise her insides and, throwing all rationality to hell, she leaned in, trying to take Yongsun’s lips in a kiss. But the older girl leaned back, and her breaths against her own wanting lips felt like a slap. It was pitiful, Byul wasn’t going to lie, but she was far too gone at that moment to just stand up and leave; no, she didn’t want that. She wanted Yongsun, everything that involved her, and she wanted her to _know_.

“I want to kiss you, unnie…” She breathed out, voice broken by desire and frustration and in normal conditions she would have even cringed by how needy she sounded, “I want to kiss you so bad I think I’m going crazy…” She even bit her own lower lip, teeth digging into tender flesh. Yongsun could only look back at her, examining her blushed face congested by want.

 _Oh, God, she wanted it too…_ But she couldn’t. And she was Kim Yongsun and she was in control, “I don’t kiss on the lips, Byul…” She said, tone dropping a few octaves until only a hoarse rasp could be heard; Byul whimpered at the sound and then, Yongsun took one of her thumbs and, carefully, she caressed the younger girl’s soft bottom lip, eyes following the movement.

It was Yongsun’s turn to lean in then, closing the distance and, eventhough her words still rang true between them, her sharp teeth took their turn to dig in Byul’s lower lip. The younger woman’s breath hitched and her fingers gripped strongly on Yongsun’s ass. It wasn’t a kiss, it wasn’t at all; but the fleeting touch of Yongsun’s lips against her own was enough to send Byul’s mind into a dark well.

It didn’t last long, Yongsun’s urges couldn’t be stopped that easily and Byul soon found the older woman devouring again the skin of her neck, voraciously, all danger and heat, “I don’t kiss on the lips, Byul…” She repeated once again, voice muffled amid the sea of fervent kisses, and Byul’s eyelids fell heavily, “but I can kiss you _anywhere_ else.” The younger woman didn’t think it was possible that Yongsun’s voice could drop even lower and become more sultry than what it already was, but she was proved wrong right there, right then. God, this woman was going to be the death of her…

And suddenly Yongsun’s hands pushed Byul’s shoulders, making her lean back on the bed; and her hungry lips didn’t take more than half a second to reconnect with her warm skin, tracing a path of kisses that started on her neck and ended on the dip of her hips. She fed on the sharpness of her collarbones, she feasted on erect nipples that became even harder against the wet touch of her tongue, hands exploring skin that lit in flames at every inch discovered, while the music of Byul’s gasps and breathy moans broke the dense silence of the room.

Yongsun let herself indulge in tender flesh, taking her time in painting with bites and hickeys a portrait of lust and suffocating sun on the blank canvas that was Byul’s body. She nibbled at the sensitive skin of the younger woman’s inner thigh, marveling at the way she stiffened for a second before melting on top of the mattress with a new moan, “unnie, p-please…” was what Byul was able to utter as Yongsun let the tip of her nose to graze her clothed center, incredibly hot, wet and inviting.

“Please what?” She answered, and Yongsun was actually someone who liked to satisfy and oblige, most of the time; but Byul was so easy to tease, and those pleas were too delicious to let them pass, her own thighs clenching with every sound the younger woman produced because of her. She let her teeth to graze the fabric of Byul’s panties, her gaze fixed on the younger woman’s face and she had to bite back a laugh when she saw how Byul’s dark eyes rolled back in a frustrated huff.

“Just… _please-_ ” Words weren’t her forte at that moment and Byul could even feel Yongsun’s smirk against her. And before she could beg for it again, the older woman simply took the delicate material of her underwear in her hands and pulled until it tore in two, the motion and the energy and the wild look in Yongsun’s face being enough to trigger a new raspy moan. _Good Lord…_

Yongsun’s look was feral and she didn’t even need Byul’s words to keep her going; her own blood pressing in her head while her heart drummed in her ears and all she could see was Byul, all open and warm and just so ready for her.

So she dived in, and Byul’s flavour slapped her across the face, and suddenly her scent was all over her being, clogging every sense and muting every rational thought. Fingers gripped at Byul’s hips, keeping her in place while her tongue lapped and consumed everything in front of her, hungrily, trying to quench a thirst that she was well aware that it was impossible to satisfy. Byul’s back arched at the first contact, head thrown back while one of her hands went down to Yongsun’s hair, gripping a fistful of her locks to just pull her in, closer, until they almost melted together.

Her head was spinning and all her senses focused on the sinful way Yongsun’s tongue traced every kind of profanity over her swollen and hypersensitive clit. She wanted to look, _oh_ , how bad she wanted to look at her, but her eyelids felt heavy and she could only let them fall, while her breathing grew even quicker and darker, a symphony of moans and gasps that escaped one after another, in crescendo, like a soundtrack during the moments previous to the climax of a good movie.

And as soon as her climax felt about to fall on her, Yongsun pulled away. Byul could yell at her at that moment, eyes opening fast and wild, a long deep moan being caught in her throat that almost made her choke. Yongsun stood up then, next to the bed, wiping her lips with the back of her hand, while a mischievous glint made her eyes shine menacingly. Kim Yongsun was a menace, _indeed_.

“Turn around, Byul-ah,” it was all she said, with that raspy and deep voice, and every complain that started forming in Byul’s accelerated brain vanished in a second, “I want you in all fours.” Byul had never moved as fast, her hands and knees digging on the soft mattress, her back towards Yongsun. Anticipation made her skin bristle and she looked over her shoulder to see how Yongsun threw away the last pieces of clothing that covered her body.

But before she could marvel on Yongsun’s fully naked figure, the older woman was already glued to her body, her front pressed tightly against Byul’s ass. And Byul could feel the heat she radiated, she could feel her wetness against her skin and it was driving her bonkers, desperation clutching her lungs and turning the easy task of breathing into something almost impossible.

Yongsun leaned in, her bare breasts caressing Byul’s back while her lips pressed a chaste kiss between her shoulder blades; her hands gripping her hips while her own hips started grinding against Byul’s behind. “You are so damn soft, Byul… You make me go crazy,” her breathing was ragged and her voice was almost poisonous. Byul felt like dying.

And as soon as Yongsun’s hands gripped her hips, one of them left the place only to reappear between Byul’s legs. And without any warning, two long fingers dug into her, all the way to the knuckle, and Byul’s back arched again with a moan that seemed to tear apart her vocal chords.

The way Yongsun rammed into her was aggressive and unforgiving, and she didn’t let her catch her breath before a new moan escaped from her lips. Suddenly two fingers became three and Byul felt herself being so deliciously stretched that she knew she wasn’t going to last for too long, not at the pace Yongsun was fucking her. She indeed was fucking her _brainless_ , just as Hyejin predicted.

Yongsun’s own breathing became even more agitated, low grunts of effort and pleasure mingled together, and her own head was thrown back when her clit rubbed in a certain way against Byul’s ass. The air grew thicker, and everything turned hotter, so hot that both of them felt about to catch fire and turn into ashes. And then the heel of Yongsun’s hand pressed on Byul’s more than demanding clit and the younger woman collapsed with the most sinful moan that Yongsun had ever heard; orgasm running through her entire body like electricity, travelling from her own core to the tip of her toes.

Byul’s chest heaved as she tried to regain her breathing, torso pressed against the bed while her hips were still up. Yongsun’s fingers abandoned her, and she felt so hollow but so satisfied that she didn’t mind the loss of contact. The older woman gripped Byul’s hips now with both hands, keeping them in place while she run in a race versus herself, rubbing against her ass. She was so close, she was so _damn_ close to explode that she could even taste the orgasm.

And then Byul pronounced her name, in a broken and raspy voice and it seemed to be the push Yongsun needed to reach the climax, her own hips thrusting towards Byul’s ass one last time and her clit sending a shockwave through every atom of her existence.

And like a fragile house of cards, her legs gave in and her body crumbled on top of Byul’s exhausted frame; sweaty skin against sweaty skin, irregular breathing and flames that still were hot inside of them.

Yongsun rolled off Byul’s back, her body landing on top of the mattress. Her gaze fixed on the ceiling of the room, the darkness only tainted by the soft golden glow of the street lights that filtered through the windows. Her chest heaved profusely, and her heart rampaged in her eardrums; it was a confusing feeling, exhaustion mixed with an unlimited amount of energy that bubbled inside of her being, and while her eyelids wanted to fall and close, her skin was craving for more.

And then Byul turned around, curling next to her body, a thin arm timidly hugging her waist and her cheek resting on one of her shoulders. Yongsun felt her stare on the side of her face, burning and deep and a satisfied sigh escaped her lips before turning her face towards the younger girl.

They shared a look then, and foreheads pressed together in a surprisingly tender gesture, hands finding each other and fingers intertwining as a tense calm settled on top of them. Just a couple of minutes of calm before a storm that would last the whole night.


	10. Chapter 10.

The soft mid-morning glow was what woke Byul up the next day. Her brows furrowed and her eyes closed tightly in an attempt to grasp at the last strands of sleep that connected her to unconsciousness. She really didn't want to open her eyes, her body being taken over a pleasurable sensation of fatigue that spreaded from between her legs to the last corner of her body. 

Her hours of sleep were very few, no doubt less than her normal sleeping schedule, but once her eyes opened, she didn't feel anything else other than bubbling energy starting to build up

in her chest. She blinked, slowly at first, trying to get rid of the remains of sleep that hung on her eyelashes. Her drowsy gaze fell straight on the pure white paint of the ceiling, the colour reflecting the morning light as if it was a mirror. 

She suddenly felt hyper-aware of where she was and who was the person she was sharing the bed with. Hastily, her head snapped towards the sleeping form of Kim Yongsun, peaceful expression on her face and disheveled hair cascading on top of the pillow; the bed sheets barely covering her naked form.

The sight was enough to render Byul breathless because damn, last night indeed, happened. She got to explore Yongsun's body and Yongsun got to lose herself on her own skin and everything exploded in symphonies and fireworks and it was the best night of her life.

A giddy and soft smile painted on Byul's lips, taking one of her hands, slightly shaky in her attempt of not waking the older woman up, to her face so she could put some wild strands of dark hair away. She was in awe, she felt her skin bristling just by the memory and god, did she want it to happen again... and again... and again, in a never ending circle of passion and lov- 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵.

Byul blinked slowly one more time, the realization of the meaning of the bubbly feeling in her chest, like a hurricane of furious butterflies trying to find their way out; the constant heat crawling up her neck and exploding on her cheeks; or just the fact that Kim Yongsun seemed to have built a whole penthouse in her thoughts. And she wasn't moving out anytime soon. She had, no doubt, fallen in love with Yongsun, and it made her heart doubled its size. 

She resisted the temptation of just kissing her awake, of kissing her awake and tell her everything that crossed her mind at that very moment; to tell her how amazing she thought she was, how beautiful, how cute and kind, how warm and how selfless.

To tell her how much she loved her, how much peace she brought to her life and at the same time how she launched her into the most absolute and delicious chaos; how she made her feel at ease and how she just... made everything better. But she decided against it, after all the older woman deserved to sleep in, at least for one morning. 

So she just enjoyed for a few long seconds the warmth of the bed before, finally, standing up and leaving the tangled mess of sheets and Yongsun's sleeping figure behind. She found her underwear and her shirt and, once somehow dressed, she decided to go to the kitchen and make some breakfast for Yongsun. So she left the room, dragging her feet on her way to the big living room. 

She looked around there, trying to take in Yongsun's home, in an attempt to breath in more of the older woman's life. Because she wanted to know everything, uncover every secret and explore every corner of her existence. Because Yongsun was worth it. But what she found in her little stroll around the living room was monochrome furniture and plain white walls and zero life. Not even a single picture was on display and that was, pretty much, unsettling for the younger woman. 

She shrugged it off for now, perhaps the older woman wasn't fan of pictures or any kind of memorabilia. So continued with her trip towards the kitchen; Yongsun was filthy rich, so for sure it had to be packed with food and she could prepare a delicious breakfast and the both of them could eat on the bed. But to her surprise, the moment she opened the fridge she found nothing but some milk, a few eggs, an almost empty jar of strawberry jam and lots of bottles of wine. 

Byul almost winced physically, thoughts starting to clog her mind at high speed while her now more shaky than before hands took out of the fridge everything but the wine. She rummaged through cabinets until she found a few slices of hard bread and some coffee. She was starting to feel dizzy.

The previously calm sea of her mind was starting to tangle itself in a storm full of thunder and rain, too many ideas, too many assumptions that wanted to be made, but that she was too much of a coward to accept even in the solitude of her head.

Byul managed to prepare some toasts with jam, rolled an omelette and brewed some coffee. She was losing her appetite, anyway, though it smelled delicious for a meal made of scraps, her stomach didn't even grumble in acknowledgement. She just placed everything on top of a tray she found on the counter and, with heavy steps, she made her way back to the room. 

She was aware of every detail now. Or the lack of thereof. Everything was too cold, there was no life in the penthouse. And if her foggy mind didn't betray her, the same applied to the bedroom. Just as if the penthouse was always empty. Just as if Yongsun almost didn't spend time at all in there. Just as if... it was a casual place for her to crash. After all, the night before the older woman told her she lived in the penthouse sometimes. She didn't get it at first but with every step towards the bedroom it was becoming even more clear. 

She stopped for a second in front of the room, allowing herself to breath deeply in an attempt to lift up the weight that seemed to have formed on her shoulders. And more composed, or so she thought, she stepped in. She found Yongsun wide awake, back against the headboard of the bed and hair tied in a messy bun. The sheets slipped down her body and her naked torso was out and free to her troubled gaze. She was typing on her phone, a bored expression on her face and when she heard Byul, she lifted her face to greet her with a glint of surprise in her eyes.

"Byul? I thought you left, or something," there was a faint smile on Yongsun's lips, and her gaze fell on the breakfast before turning into a nervous stare that drilled into Byul's pupils.

"I made you breakfast..." Byul answered, walking towards the bed to just leave the tray next to Yongsun, who looked at the food again before looking back at Byul. The message of her eyes was hard to decipher, but her whole posture screamed discomfort. 

"Thank you, you didn't have to," Yongsun said, leaving the tray away on the bed before standing up, gloriously naked. 

Byul's heart clenched painfully at the sight, her assumptions coming back full force to scream at her to just accept it, coming back to scream at her to just swallow her new found feelings because Yongsun was a wall that couldn't be crossed. Yongsun rubbed her face with her hands, exhaling a loud and deep sigh before putting on some clothes. And once she was at least decently covered she turned to the younger woman, an apologetic smile on her face. It was a fake one.

"Aren't your finals soon? You should be studying, you better just go home," she said, nonchalant, as if her words didn't pierce Byul's already bleeding heart, "I have to go to the office too, anyway," Yongsun shrugged, going to the closet in search of an outfit. It was as empty as the rest of the house. 

And Byul wanted to ask, Byul wanted to demand answers, she wanted to scream and curl and cry, but she could only stare at her homemade breakfast, getting cold on top of the bed. 

"Are you not going to eat?" She could only ask, and hell, she felt pathetic.

"Eh? Yeah, I will eat before going to work, don't worry. Thank you, really," Yongsun grabbed her phone then, a new hollow smile on her lips and the glint of a caged animal in her eyes. She just wanted to escape. "I will call a taxi for you, okay? Just... get ready."

It stung more than she would ever admit even to herself. To let your heart to soar through the skies just for it to fall seconds later and shatter against a cold wall of indifference. Byul couldn't think about anything else while she was getting dressed, nor when she was already in the taxi, with the ghost of Yongsun's fingertips setting on fire her skin and the icy touch of her lips kissing her cheek goodbye with a promise of a text. 

She didn't crumble, though. Not until hours later, when a new generous deposit was made into their shared bank account. It was that moment when tears took over, already in the solitude of her room, buried in blankets and pillows and self-pity, because she really fell in love with someone who did the very same thing she swore not to do the night before; to cast her away after a night together.


	11. Chapter 11.

Byul set her pen aside and, with a tired sigh, she leaned back on her chair, taking off her glasses to rub her eyes with the heel of her hands. Little bright dots floated over the blackness of her sights, while next to her, the scribbling of a second pen came to a halt.

The rustling of papers took her attention, the exhausted gaze of two bloodshot eyes staring at the younger girl that she had been tutoring for a few hours already; she could see the tiredness on her soft features as well, and a small encouraging smile painted on her lips; they were about to finish, anyway.

"So, how do you think you did?" The younger girl pouted in an almost childish manner, round eyes turning pensive and fluffy cheeks puffing. 

"I'm not sure about exercises 4 and 7, but I think I did the others pretty well..?" she ended in a question, a sheepish smile taking over her features and Byul couldn't help but smile a little bit wider. 

"I have faith on my talent for making useful flashcards, if you have been using them you will be fine, Wooming," Byul replied, ruffling Jiwoo's hair with her hand, causing the high school student to grunt in annoyance and to recoil while her hands flew to her bangs, to put them back in place, "let me just go over these exercises and mark them and then we will good to go," the older woman said, blinking away the sleep and tiredness of her eyes to focus on the task at hand. 

She could feel Jiwoo packing her stuff while she read through the exercises, looking for mistakes, but pleasantly surprised to find close to none, her eyebrows rising while a tiny spark of pride got caught in her chest; when she started tutoring Kim Jiwoo, the girl was about to give up in both biology and maths, and in just a year, she had improved remarkably. 

Once Byul got to the end of the paper, she only used her red pen to fix a couple of tiny grammar mistakes, but when it came to content, everything was as perfect as it could be. She fixed her gaze on Jiwoo, all round eyes and expectation glistening in dark pupils, and a smile painted her features again. 

"Well, Wooming, if you do it like this tomorrow during the text I predict you'll be getting full marks, I'm impressed," said Byul, giving the paper back to her student, who let out a faint cry of happiness as well as performed a dramatic fist bump to the air. 

Byul laughed again before leaning back on her chair, stretching her arms over her head in a lazy gesture that caught Jiwoo's attention. 

"Are you tired, unnie?" asked the girl, brow furrowing in worry when her innocent big eyes took in the exhausted look of Byul's face and the prominent black circles under her eyes. 

Byul just smiled softly, nodding her head before standing up next to her desk. They were in Byul's dorm room, where she always tutored her dear high school students. 

"I'm fine, don't worry. It is just that I have been studying a lot these days, my finals are next week and you know... the grind never stops!" She exclaimed, trying to sound cheerful when the truth was that she just wanted to collapse in bed and perhaps cry some more. 

She was worn out; the pressure of the finals and the hours spent devouring words and knowledge in her despair to just forget, for at least a while, the reason her nights always ended in sour tears that stained her pillow wet. But Jiwoo didn't have to know that, so she just smiled the best she could, even though the smile tasted bitter in her mouth. Jiwoo's frown became more pronounced and a new pout appeared on her lips.

"Well, unnie, you need to rest too! Once you finish your finals I will treat you to ice cream!" And Byul almost melted, endeared to not end by this kid's pure heart. 

"I'll take your word on that, then," she smiled again, but then a thought crossed her mind and her eyebrows shot up in a question, "do you have someone to pick you up?" 

For sure she didn't want Jiwoo to go back alone or walking, it was pretty late already. But Jiwoo just smiled prettily again and nodded with a hum.

"Yeah, don't worry, Sooyoungie will come to pick me up," she checked the time on her phone, "and I think she is already waiting outside," she said while pocketing her phone and placing her bag over her shoulder. 

"Then we shouldn't make the big bad Sooyoung wait, we don't want her getting annoyed, right?" Byul smiled teasingly and Jiwoo just smirked, exiting the older woman's room. 

"Unnie, I have Sooyoungie wrapped around my finger, there is no way she could get annoyed at me. She looks all tough, but that's just an act," Jiwoo shrugged and Byul laughed in amusement.

"I don't think she would appreciate you saying this kind of stuff about her," Jiwoo laughed as well, nearing the exit of the dorm building. 

"It is okay, unnie, because she reserves her soft side only for me, I am the lucky one." 

And that hit home with Byul, as she felt as the most unlucky person to ever exist during the last week. A week of radio silence and zero news from Kim Yongsun.

True to her words, once they left the building, parked just in front, the fit and tall figure of Ha Sooyoung waited for her girlfriend, leaning on her white scooter, all clad in tight jeans and leather jacket, straight long and dark hair falling over her shoulders and a bored look on her eyes.

Next to the 17 years old scooter driver, on top of the seat, was resting a big and intimidating motorbike helmet. It was funny to Byul, to see how much this girl tried to look hard and tough, while by her younger student's words, it was all a façade. Perhaps a mean of self-defense? A made-up image to protect herself against external human threats? It made sense to Byul and she was, indeed, pretty attracted by the thought of emulating the high school senior. To build a wall to preserve the remains of her heart and, just maybe, piece it together again. 

Her reverie was cut short when her 16 years old student took her hand in a warm squeeze, big round eyes looking up at her with a new smile. 

"Well, unnie, I'll be leaving then. I'll text you as soon as I finish my exam!" she exclaimed while she made her way to her girlfriend, looking back at Byul only to speak again, "and go to sleep soon today, you need to rest!" Byul could only smile at how genuine her words sounded, nodding her head and waving her hand in farewell while she observed the encounter between the couple.

Sooyoung's previously uninterested gaze turned into a galaxy of warmth and stars the moment she took her girlfriend in, and a big dopey smile graced her pretty features while her long arms circled around Jiwoo's tiny frame, hugging her tightly while the shorter girl nuzzled her nose against her neck with a smile on her own. 

The moment seemed to be so intimate, so fresh and genuine and so... 𝘨𝘰𝘥, she just could wish it was her melting between Yongsun's arms. Her hands closed into tight fists and her arms crossed over her chest, as if she was trying to hug herself as well.

She watched as the intimidating looking girl helped Jiwoo to sit on the scooter and then placed the big heavy motorbike helmet on her girlfriends head while she was left to wear the tiny one that she now realized was hanging on the handlebars of the scooter. Jiwoo was right, after all she really did have the big baddie wrapped on her finger. 

She locked gazes with Sooyoung the moment both girls were settled on top of the scooter and ready to leave, Jiwoo waving again at her with that blinding smile that Byul could only give back.

"Drive safely, Sooyoung-ah! You have a precious cargo on your back," Byul said just as Jiwoo's arms circled Sooyoung's slim waist, flushing against her back. Sooyoung smiled back at her and nodded. 

"Don't worry, unnie. I am really aware of that. Good night!" Byul waved one last time and she could catch Jiwoo's last and loud "good night, Byul unnie!" before the scooter got lost in the middle of Seoul's night traffic. 

Byul sighed then, feeling cold out of sudden, and she just turned around and went back into the dorm. Once in her room, she went close to her desk, her books sprawled on top of the wood surface, as she was studying while Jiwoo was doing her exercises. She decided against going back to study, deciding to call it a day, after all she had been at it since the fateful day Yongsun stepped on her heart.

Her jaw closed tightly as soon as the thought crossed her mind, doing everything to stop it in its tracks, to prevent it from spreading through her mind and intoxicating her soul again; but it was impossible, it was like a dam opened and everything fell on her again, leaving her breathless. 

She moved to her bed then, sitting there with her phone on her hands and the lack of any new text notification slapped her across the face as it had been doing for a little more than a week now. Yongsun was ghosting her. That was pretty obvious. She got what she wanted from her, literally bought it and in the middle of business and games she even stole her heart as well, only to ghost her hours later. 

And it hurt. It hurt more than what Byul would even admit because for someone who prided herself to be witty and smart, she was proved to be a goddamn fool who fell for empty promises, heated gazes, hot touches and a mysterious person. Mysterious and gorgeous and sexy and breathtakingly amazing and... someone who turned her world upside down just to leave her lost and without sense of direction.

She turned off her phone then; it was her only way to prevent her desperate side to take control and just call or send her a text demanding answers. She was set on not making a fool of herself, not anymore. But still the tears got to her, hot and evil and weirdly comforting on some way, the wet warm touch feeling like a caress down her cheeks. 

And she laughed, feeling extremely pathetic and frustrated because 𝘸𝘩𝘺 couldn't she have what Jiwoo and Sooyoung had? They were young but they were devoted to each other and just the perfect fit and they would always protect each other's heart. Why hers had to be stepped on and crushed beyond repair? It wasn't fair. It really wasn't. She didn't deserve this. 

So she leaned back on her bed, blurry gaze fixed on streetlight stained ceiling and she cried one more night. Tears fell restlessly and she wished she could just drown in them. Luckily for her, exhaustion took over her body soon enough, the dam closing and thoughts drifting to dreamland; to a world with warm sheets and warm eyes and warm lips whispering "I love you too" into her ear.


	12. Chapter 12.

Days turned into a week and that week duplicated in two, the seconds pilling one on top of the other, and the weight pressed down on Byul's shoulders almost preventing her from even breathing; an aimless existence whose only purpose was to drown in words and books and tears.

It's been two weeks already, two slow and exhausting weeks in which Kim Yongsun hasn't texted her even once. At the start of the second week, Byul stopped looking at her phone in despair, searching for a text notification that wasn't there, yearning for the familiar ringtone she assigned to the older woman since the first moment she saved her number. She stopped looking at it, knowing that with every look at a black screen, reality would just take its chance to slap her across the face one more time. And she was pretty tired of it, honestly.

But at the end of the day, alone in her room, her thoughts wandered to equally wandering hands travelling her skin, to sharp bites and hot kissed and two smouldering brown eyes that never failed to take her breath away, even if it was only in a memory. She couldn't take them out of her mind, it was as if Kim Yongsun was a curse. And perhaps she was. 

Byul exhaled a deep sigh that got her chest heaving, grunting under her breath in frustration towards herself as her thoughts drifted again to the actual bane of her existence; fingers tightening around her pen.

"What did that pen even do to you, unnie?" Asked Hyejin, one of her eyebrows arched in wonder before sharing a look with Wheein. 

The three of them were at their usual coffee shop, trying to cram in the last minute huge amounts of content before an exam. Well, at least Wheein and Hyejin were. Byul has been more than focused on her exams, the threat of the finals being her saving grace; and for sure if she voiced that thought any other student would probably look at her as if she had grown two heads, but for her it was her coping method, the only way she had not to combust in her own despaired thoughts that screamed Yongsun's name at the beat of her heart pulsing in her chest, broken and with missing pieces. 

Byul blinked then, her detrimental reverie interrupted by Hyejin's words, and she lifted up her gaze towards the younger girl, hazy and unfocused after being fixed for a couple of minutes already in a particular word of her notes that, at this point, already lost its meaning. 

"W-what?" She even stuttered and she felt her cheeks warm up in embarrassment; she already felt pathetic enough on a daily.

Hyejin just pointed at her fingers pressing tightly around the pen, white knuckles and hand shaking. Byul looked at it, and it seemed to be all she needed to do to realize the situation, her brain clogged with Yongsun barely processing anything else; and suddenly a silent yelp  left her lips as the pen slipped from her shaky hand. 

Hyejin and Wheein shared a new look, full of worry and understanding as they knew about Byul's current situation. And while Wheein's eyes shone with pity, a spark of frustration and annoyance lit in Hyejin's dark irises; both watching as Byul buried her face in her hands with a new and tired sigh. 

She seemed to be the shadow of someone they used to know and it was painful to watch how such a bright woman turned to be... this. And it pissed Hyejin off, it pissed her off so bad because she felt powerless and useless while her friend spiralled into the chaos of heartbreak. Hyejin rolled her eyes with a frustrated growl, her hand coming into contact with the wooden table, startling both of her friends by the noise. 

"I swear to god, if I ever see this Kim Yongbitch again... If I ever see her again it's on sight!" She exclaimed through clenched jaws and pressed teeth, flames bright in her eyes. Wheein's startled gaze went from Hyejin to Byul, who had raised her head to look at Hyejin with a sad smile on her lips, a distant look in her eyes.

"Wouldn't that be lovely? Seeing her again..." Hyejin's nostrils flared at those words, rising abruptly from her seat. She was tired; she was tired of seeing Byul consuming herself in self-pity and books. She was tired of not being able to help. And she was tired of Byul not even trying to help herself. 

"It's been two weeks already, Byul unnie." Her tone was harsh and reality took its chance again to slap Byul's face. She winced, but that didn't stop Hyejin, "it's been two weeks and the oh so rich and above everything CEO hasn't even bothered to text you to ask you about your finals," Hyejin gritted her teeth, cheeks flushed in anger, "she got her way with you and then vanished into thin air and you are here turning into something I don't recognize anymore. And unnie, I really can't do this anymore, I can't see you like this, crumbling onto yourself and hiding in books to lick your wounds only to re-open them when the night falls." 

Wheein looked at Byul and at Hyejin with wide scared eyes, not used to see her childhood friend like that, and worried about the effect of her words on Byul. But Byul's stare was unreadable, fixed on some point of Hyejin's shoulder; she wasn't sure if she was listening to her, at all. 

"Heartbreak hurts, unnie. I know that. But sometimes you have to suck it up and move on because if not, it will suck you deep into a dark hole. And I don't want that for you." Hyejin started packing her things, putting her textbooks into her bag and once she was done, she put it over one shoulder, a hard but understanding look in her eyes. "Give it a thought, unnie. That woman is a bitch that literally bought you only to use you. She is not worth of you losing yourself," she lifted one of her hands to her head, touching her temple with her index finger, "you are a smart girl, you will figure it out if you try. See you later," and with that, the youngest of the three left the table, heading to her next exam.

At Hyejin's departure, the air floating around the table turned thick and awkward, and Wheein didn't know what to do, lost and defenseless. Until Byul's gaze fell on her, and where during the past two weeks have been only emptiness, sadness and something that looked like acceptance stared at her. 

"Do you think the same as Hyejin, Wheein?" asked Byul, voice soft and trembling, just as if she was afraid of her answer. Wheein could only nod with a sigh, taking one of Byul's hands with her own, squeezing it reassuringly. 

"Forgive Hyejin, unnie… She is worried about you and she doesn't know how to control herself when she gets frustrated. But she cares about you and wants what's best for you, just like I do," Wheein exhaled a soft breath, fixing her stare on Byul's broken one, "and I agree with her. The sugar mommy thing was nice while it lasted, but you should have stopped it the moment feelings started getting involved..." Wheein nibbled her lower lip, caressing the back of Byul's hand with her fingers, "she is a filthy rich CEO, unnie... do you really think her interest on a broke student would last forever? I am really so sorry this happened to you, unnie, but you are better than this, and for sure you deserve the best and this ain't it." 

Wheein was usually bubbly and sarcastic, always ready to tease and laugh, but at that time she looked at Byul with an open gaze full of sincerity, so overwhelming that Byul felt tears starting to pool in her eyes, her hand squeezing Wheein's in return.

"I know you are strong, unnie," Wheein tried a soft smile, dimple appearing on her cheek and Byul managed a small tired laugh, bringing her free hand to Wheein's face to press her finger into the depth of said dimple. 

"I guess... I guess you are right," Byul sighed again, her gaze dropping to her books and notes, and it was her turn then to nibble on her lower lip, preventing it from trembling as her tears finally escaped the jail of her eyelashes and ran free down her cheeks, "I really can't keep feeling like this," and she was fast on wiping her face, forcing a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, but still it was the best smile Wheein had seen on her in two weeks.

"Let's do something, okay?" said Byul then, and it picked Wheein's interest; the resolute and determined sound of her voice, and a little flame of hope caught in her chest. 

"What something, unnie?" Byul inhaled deeply, taking her right hand between both of them, pinky finger extended, requesting Wheein's in a childhood ritual of a promise. 

"I promise you that, if by the end of next week I haven't had any notice from her, I'll try my best to move on," she said and Wheein blinked in surprise. And then she remembered one of her conversations with the older girl, how the CEO invited her to this very important party right before fucking her senseless and then vanish into thin air. Wheein gave it some thought, and then Byul kept talking, "also, she told me that if I aced my finals, she would pay for my entire tuition for next year. And Wheein, believe me, I pretend to get that money. Even if that involves me writing a letter to the fucking Neutrogena office," that took a laugh out of Wheein and, finally, she laced her pinky finger with the one Byul was offering still, squeezing it slightly.

"That's a deal then, unnie," and it was like a weight was lifted from Wheein's shoulders, her gaze taking in the glint of motivation and hope that sparked in Byul's eyes. If that's what was keeping Byul going, she would take it, no matter what could happen in the week that was left. 

Byul found herself smiling genuinely then. Maybe not as big as she used to, but it was a real smile, nonetheless. She was a game and Yongsun was business, she was certain of it now. Player two entered the game. She just needed to become a murder and kill her heart for real.


	13. Chapter 13.

The third Tuesday welcomed Yongsun with a slap of documents on top of her desk and a cloud of blonde hair and broken eyes in her mind. The young CEO was restless, just as she had been since the exact second Byul left her penthouse weeks ago; fingertips itching to touch skin or just to write down a text for the younger woman.

But none of that happened; as she was caught in a wind whirl of contradictory emotions that took her heart and smashed it against every corner of her being. It was like a curse, really. She couldn’t close her eyes without recalling Byul’s sad expression the morning after their night together, without thinking how, when something broke inside the younger woman’s pupils, she just knew she took a fatal misstep that provoked that situation. A very bitter taste seized her mouth just by thinking about it, the memory of that bright light in Byul’s eyes disappearing with a flash of hurt. And she was the cause of it.

Yongsun sighed, leaning her head of top of the wooden desk in her office, arms stretched over the piece of furniture, with fingers gripping at cold wood and jaws locking tightly. She just couldn’t stop thinking about that day and it was driving her completely insane. Because she was the trigger of that convoluted situation, to begin with; because it was something that happened out of her control, and the ever so composed woman was too late to prevent it or to repair the damage when it was finally done.

She couldn’t help it, really. She woke up that day with a sensation of pure bliss running through her body, which even if it was tired, it was also bubbling with energy and she just wanted to keep feeling like that forever. She felt full, for the first time in her 28 years of living.

And that scared her shitless.

So when Byul entered the penthouse room with a tray full of food and a hopeful smile on her face, her heart skipped a beat and the butterflies in her stomach fluttered in an aggressive hurricane that almost took the air of her lungs. It was terrifying, the warmth that spreaded through each cell composing her body was something so strange and unfamiliar that she panicked and did what she did best: running away.

Kim Yongsun didn’t do feelings. She didn’t know how to manage them and never had an example of a good, solid and loving relationship in her life growing up. Her parents married to money and it was the beginning and the downfall of a relationship that lasted long enough to nurse two teenage daughters before everything fell like a bucket of cold water, so icily sharp that it felt cutting to the skin.

Everything about Yongsun’s life has always revolved about money; she wasn’t a people person, and though she was good at that game of seduction, this time she really got the losing hand. Because it was a game she expected to win just like in everything she did, fool around a bit and then go back on the hunting field looking for a new prey. But she wasn’t prepared to the sting that pierced her heart since that stupid morning, and the fact that everything Moon Byulyi was clogging her mind and, she dared to say, every inch of her existence, wasn’t helping.

God, she wanted to talk to her. She wanted to see her, to hold her, to… kiss her senseless, until every drop of pain gets forgotten and beg for forgiveness, because Byul deserved it. That thought alone made Yongsun’s breath to quicken, panic settling in once again.

Nights became restless and deep dark circles formed below her eyes and she was tired. But she couldn’t rest because as soon as she closed her eyes, Byul’s broken figure welcomed her once again. She couldn’t escape.

Yongsun felt tears filling up her eyes and she pressed her eyelids tightly, trying everything to keep them at bay; Yongsun never cries, Yongsun isn’t weak.

But the truth is that she is, weaker and more fragile than what she would ever admit. Her phone was scalding hot inside the pocket of her pants, a painful reminder that she had the solution to her problems a few clicks away, that she could see Byul and crawl to her feet again; but she was a coward and it was left there, burning her skin over the fabric of her clothes. She was, indeed, going mad.

A frustrated laugh came out her throat then, at the same time the first tear escaped the prison of her eyelids and it fell suicidal on top of the wooden table; a tear that turned into a full fledged sob that then repeated itself over and over until Yongsun broke down like she has never done, pain and regret and frustration and panic mingling together and taking all her strength away. She felt pathetic.

That’s how Eunbi found her minutes later, crying her heart’s content out, laying on top of the expensive wooden table. Eunbi’s blood ran cold at the sight of her boss and best friend wailing like that, and she closed the door behind her before rushing to Yongsun, kneeling besides her.

“Yongsun? Oh my god, Yong, are you okay?” At her friend’s voice, Yongsun jumped back, sitting straight on her chair and panicked eyes found another pair full of worry and concern. Yongsun was fast on wiping her tears with the back of her hands, a shaky smirk drawing itself on her lips in an useless attempt to mask her real emotions, ones that Eunbi witnessed when nobody shouldn’t have.

“Me? I’m perfectly fine, Eunbi, I was just… resting my eyes, yeah,” Yongsun cleared her throat to fight her broken voice, and her trembling hands made their way to the laptop, to bring it closer and just… do something else.

But Eunbi wasn’t getting none of that. She got back on her feet, sat on the desk and, without a word, she closed Yongsun’s laptop, the older woman ready to bite back in protest. But Eunbi was faster this time again.

“Cut the crap, Yong,” Eunbi’s voice cold but with a worried edge that made Yongsun sick in the stomach again, “I know you are not fucking okay. I know you haven’t been okay for weeks already, do you think I am stupid? We have been friends for years and I have never seen you this miserable,” Yongsun flinched at her words and she leaned back in her chair, just as if she was trying to hide among its leather and just avoid this, “just tell me what’s going on, Yong… I am worried about you, you also haven’t been eating well and those dark circles are truly concerning, are you getting sleep at all?” Eunbi’s hand was warm on Yongsun’s cheek, and as her thumb caressed said dark circles, tenderly, Yongsun’s hazy eyes fixed on her friend’s face.

“I…” She tried to find her voice, tried to get out of her the reason of her tears, “I’m… broken, Eunbi. I’ve always been,” she whispered then, her sight falling from Eunbi’s understanding face towards her closed laptop on her table, the weight of her phone growing heavier by the second, “and I think I pushed away the only genuine thing I have ever had because I don’t know how to feel and I panicked and I have been ghosting her and…” Yongsun leaned even further into her seat, her voice losing its little strength, and Eunbi’s caresses moved from her face to her hair, silent and waiting, her fingers threading long strands of black and silk.

“It is okay to be scared, Yongsun,” Eunbi’s voice turned tender and soft, and Yongsun just sighed with a hiss, “perhaps you think you are above everything mundane, but you are a person, Yongsun. And maybe your experiences growing up weren’t ideal, but it is never late to learn,” Eunbi nodded firmly, trying to draw a small smile, “and if this… genuine thing you mentioned makes you happy, don’t you think it is worth to try and be brave?”

Yongsun looked up at Eunbi again, eyes open and vulnerable and she have never felt so pathetic and weak before, “I… I don’t know…” Eunbi rolled her eyes for a second, turning around to grab one of the folders that were on top of Yongsun’s desk.

“Can I do something knowing that I won’t get fired for it?” Yongsun blinked at her in confusion and, slowly, she nodded her head. Only to get it smacked by the folder Eunbi was holding. 

“Ow!” Yongsun grabbed her head when the smack repeated a few more times and, once satisfied, Eunbi left the folder back on the table, “what the fuck was that for?!”

“Get a grip, Kim Yongsun!” Was all Eunbi said as an answer, and strangely, five stupid words had enough power to just slap the haziness of her brain away, “you are Kim Yongsun, you are the youngest and most successful CEO in Neutrogena’s Korean branch, and the most hard-working and passionate person I know. And the Kim Yongsun I know doesn’t chicken away in front of anything, not even feelings!” Eunbi’s hand slapped the wooden desk, the sound startling Yongsun, who looked at her friend with a new-found wonder, “and if you care about this person so much, if they make you happy, I know you will find a way to solve whatever the hell fuck up you did, because I know you and I know you always come up with a solution for every problem,” Eunbi got on her feet again, grabbing the folder one more time to land a last smack on Yongsun’s head, for good measure.

Eunbi then leaned in, placing a small tender kiss on Yongsun’s forehead, and Yongsun followed her with her eyes when the younger woman walked towards the door of her office, eyes wide and red and make up ruined, a soon to be born headache about to form. Eunbi stopped by the door, looking back at her before opening it and offering her friend a last encouraging smile, “I trust you, Yongsun. And I place my trust on your happiness. Don’t let me down,” was all she said before leaving the room, leaving Yongsun with her thoughts full of white noise and Byul and a new found sense of security that started growing in the middle of her chest.

And before that tiny spark of security and hope vanished into nothing, she took the scandling phone out of her pocket, and with desperate fingers she, on a hateful Tuesday, decided to try and change the game of her life for the better in the shape of a text message.

“ _Your finals are done, right? Are you free today?_ ”


	14. Chapter 14.

Yongsun’s text was enough to drive Byul up the wall. Her first reaction was numb as she could only stare at the screen and read over and over again the words there written. Until her brain finally snapped awake and she dialed Wheein’s number in a hurry. She was a fumbling mess, words tumbling over one another in her haste to explain the situation to her younger friend. Still, Wheein could make sense out of Byul’s chaotic speech, and she was astonished that Yongsun reached out to Byul at all.

“Wheein, what do I do?” a whining Byul asked, voice breathless and almost desperate. Wheein cleared her throat.

“Well, what do you want to do?” asked Wheein back, and before Byul could bite back a response, she spoke again, “you don’t have to answer, you know what you want to do, and I do too. Remember our promise the other day? You are free to go if you want, unnie,” Wheein pressed her lips in a fine tense line, wanting more than anything to stop Byul from going to Yongsun and just keep her safe, but she knew what her friend needed. And the third week was just starting, so their promise’s balance leaned to Yongsun’s side. Hyejin would be pissed as fuck, though.

“Just… promise me one more thing, unnie,” Wheein spoke again, a hint of concern being audible in her voice. 

“What?” Was Byul’s expectant response, already more relaxed after her friend’s words. Wheein exhaled a soft sigh. 

“Promise me you won’t let her play you again, and that you will keep your guard up, please,” Byul’s own sigh could be heard at the other side of the line and she nodded even though Wheein couldn’t see her.

“Yes, don’t worry about that, Wheein. I learned my lesson.”

So two hours later, just as the afternoon started to roll in, Byul found herself waiting for Yongsun outside of her dorm, sweaty nervous hands clenched in fists inside the pockets of her pants and her heart beating so loudly against her eardrums that she thought she would end up deaf. She did not know what to expect, or what the reason of Yongsun wanting to meet after two weeks of radio silence was, but trepidation bubbled inside of her like a volcano about to explode, and when she could finally see the familiar blue lambo getting close to where she was waiting, her mind just emptied of every thought.

White noise entered her brain the moment she could made out Yongsun’s face through the sunlight stained windshield of the car, as the older woman parked in front of her and opened the passenger seat door from the inside, a small smile dancing on her lips. But Byul’s legs were glued to the concrete, and it wasn’t until Yongsun voiced up a calling with the shape of her name that she finally moved and her feet dragged her into the car.

Sitting on the comfortable seat of the car, she turned her gaze to Yongsun, gasping silently when she found the older woman already looking back at her; she was clad in a soft blue button down shirt and some jeans, looking cozy and at ease, but her eyes were staring at her with a mix of nervousness and longing that only made Byul’s heartbeat to speed up even more.

“Hi,” Yongsun breathed out, inhaling deeply and, after what seemed centuries of heated gazes locked into each other, the blue lambo returned to Seoul’s roads. The air inside of the car was thickening with each passing second, silence growing denser and heavier and it clung to them like the weight of the elephant that was indeed in the room, making noise and about to wreak havoc.

“Where are you taking me?” asked Byul and she hated how tiny and vulnerable her voice sounded, her hands gripping her seatbelt in a white-knuckled fist. Yongsun was driving through an area of Seoul she didn’t really recognize, since she wasn’t one to walk through the wealthy district. She used that chance to get more at ease, and let her gaze to drift over the fancy shops and expensive restaurants she couldn’t afford.

“We are going shopping. The company dinner is this Saturday, remember?” Yongsun’s voice was firm and calm, and it kind of put Byul on edge, to notice the difference between them. Because she couldn’t read Yongsun no matter how hard she tried. Byul huffed then, one of her hands flying to her long blonde mane to put some rebel strands of hair in place, nodding. 

“I see,” her tone was curt, almost cutting and sharp on the edges, and that drew Yongsun’s attention, her gaze drifting to Byul for a second while she started parking her car in front of a very fancy looking clothing store.

“I think I owe you an apology, Byul-ah,” said Yongsun then, and the younger girl stiffened on her seat, head turning towards the CEO so fast she almost felt her neck crack. She gulped then, she wasn’t expecting those words and the earnest gaze Yongsun sent her way, so she nodded once again.

“I think so too, unnie,” her voice was still sharp and harsh and she caught the way Yongsun winced for a second before she could school her features back into a poker face.

“I didn’t mean to disappear for two whole weeks,” Yongsun’s gaze was unwavering, locked like a spell on her pupils; but then a shadow of doubt washed over it, the deep breath the older woman released sounding way too trembling, “but I was packed with work and you also had your finals and I really didn’t want to bother you,” Yongsun’s grip on the steering wheel was tight, aggressive, and her voice sounded softer and almost insecure, but Byul didn’t realize any of that, too busy drinking the words in; words she was thirsty for, dying to hear them, to have something to cling onto. To have at least the tiniest hope that she could mean something to Yongsun, at all.

And though she wanted to ask and demand for more answers, the way Yongsun was looking at her was enough to have Byul nodding once again, the corners of her mouth lifting themselves in a small smile.

“It’s okay, unnie, I really studied a lot and I think I did well,” she babbled about her exams then, noticing how a bit of the awkwardness around them vanished in the air, “I told you I am set on getting that full paid tuition you promised,” and she diverted then her face back to the fancy entrance of the store that waited for them, in time to miss the pained look that crossed Yongsun’s face as if was lightning. Because it was always the fucking money…

Yongsun reached a hand then, her palm coming into contact with Byul’s cheek and her thumb running through the sharp line of her jaw. Byul’s eyes shot upwards to Yongsun’s face, finding the sad smile that painted the older woman’s lips, one that wasn’t there previously. 

“I missed you, Byul-ah,” said Yongsun, and before Byul could starting thinking a response, the warm touch of Yongsun’s hands left her cheek, leaving behind a feeling of absence and letting an icy sensation to travel through her skin, bristling it almost painfully, and Byul wanted more than anything to feel again that soft touch all over her being.

Yongsun left the car then, taking with her the trench coat that was on the backseat and wearing it while she waited for Byul to get out of the car as well. The younger woman went to Yongsun and then the CEO placed a hand on the small of her back, guiding her inside the fancy store.

Upon setting a foot into the establishment, the clerk came to receive them with a smile on her face and a glint of recognition in her smart brown eyes, “ah, miss Kim, it is so good to see you here again,” said the clerk, a middle aged woman that was all sweetness and courtesy. 

Byul was sure that the sugary tone of her voice was directed to Yongsun’s big fat wallet and not the woman itself, but she wasn’t going to speak it out any time soon; she was sure Yongsun knew that as well, “what can I do for you today, miss Kim?”

“Good afternoon, ma’am,” Yongsun replied with a smile that was all white teeth and little dimples, and placing her hand again on the small of Byul’s back, she made the clerk’s attention to change to the youngest woman, “I want to get the perfect outfit for my friend here, if it is possible,” Byul tried her best not to stiffen at Yongsun’s words, though they felt like a punch straight in the gut. Her jaw tightened, teeth clenching almost painfully and, when the clerk blinked in confusion at her expression, she forced herself to relax her face in a smile that tasted bitter in her tongue.

The clerk’s smile was infuriating, knowing, as if she was used to do this; to find the perfect fit of clothes for Yongsun’s little friends, and the glint in her eyes now seemed to be one of pity. God, Byul was hating each second she spent in this store. But before she could even consider leaving the establishment and the two women behind, the clerk was taking her hand and guiding her deep into the store, into one of the many and ample changing rooms there were. Everything was opulent, and the money people spent in the store was something Byul could even smell in the air. Suddenly, she felt about to get sick of the stomach.

“Well, sweetheart, what kind of outfit were you thinking about?” The mellow voice of the clerk sounded next to her ear, as she was busy taking Byul’s measurements. Byul didn’t even notice when the woman started working, too lost in her thoughts. 

“Uh, a suit, if it is possible?” She asked, tentatively, lifting her arms when the woman requested her chest measurements. 

“A suit, huh?” The woman hummed and Byul felt then the need to be petty, as if it was a little revenge against Yongsun, against her hot and cold treatment and against everything she saw in the clerk eyes, no matter if it was the truth or something made up by her own weak and vulnerable mind. 

“I want the most expensive one, too, ma’am,” the clerk lifted her eyes to Byul then, gazes meeting in the mirror in front of them.

And Byul wasn’t sure what the woman saw in her eyes, but the clerk just nodded with a small smile and left the changing room, leaving Byul by herself for some long minutes that dragged slowly. Or perhaps it felt like that because Byul’s mind was racing against her own will. A myriad of poisonous thoughts clogged her brain, and a kaleidoscope of different scenarios where Yongsun’s companion was some faceless woman saturated her senses. 

It shouldn’t be like this, and Byul knew it. It shouldn’t hurt. And if it did hurt, she should use that to just build her walls faster, higher. She had a moment of weakness back in the car, and she was sure that it couldn’t happen again. Kim Yongsun wasn’t going to break her again. She swore that to Wheein. She swore it thinking also about Hyejin and her fiery way of worrying. She swore it to herself.

So she exhaled, letting all the steam to go out through parted lips and even feeling the way the craziness of her heartbeat slowed down, a smile of content and determination forming on her face. And then the clerk came back in, an all black set of pants, vest and jacket hanging on her arm and Byul’s smile widened; she didn’t even need to try it on to know that she had found her perfect fit.

A whole hour passed while Byul and Yongsun were in the store, the clerk taking measurements for some little adjustment that needed to be made with the pants and the jacket; and when Byul filled in her address for the delivery of the suit the following days and once Yongsun paid a generous amount of money, both of them were back in Yongsun’s blue lambo, driving through Seoul’s sun bathed roads.

Byul could feel herself growing tense again, her whole being pulsing in contradictory emotions towards the driver of the car. Yongsun kept stealing glances at the younger girl; she didn’t see Byul in her new suit and curiosity was eating her alive and her mind was flowing freely.

“So you won’t tell me how is the suit I paid for? How nice of you,” Yongsun’s tone was playful and easy and Byul only shrugged in response. 

“I like the surprise effect, unnie,” the older woman laughed darkly, turning her head towards Byul when they stopped at a traffic light, one of her dangerous feline smiles again on her lips and Byul noticed her heartbeat speeding up again, against her will. 

“I can’t wait to see you wearing it, then,” said Yongsun, voice dropping an octave and gaze turning hazier while it drifted all over Byul’s body. 

Gods, the effects of Yongsun on her were devastating and it was truly concerning, how fast she reacted to the older woman and how her skin desperately craved her attention. Byul opened her mouth to reply, but Yongsun beat her to it, her gaze drifting to the still red traffic light for a second before boring again in Byul’s pupils. 

“Byul… do you want to come with me to the penthouse, uhm?” The tone of her voice was a promise of adventure and for sure a wild orgasm, but the mention of the penthouse, Yongsun’s house that wasn’t really her house, was enough to clear the foggy mess that her mind was starting to turn into.

Byul gasped silently, those words acting like a claw closing fiercely around her throat and preventing her from breathing. Oh, how she wanted to go with Yongsun to the end of the world and get lost in her skin; but she was panicking because, just as her friends told her, being a toy, no matter how well-paid, wasn’t something she deserved. She thought of Hyejin and her fire, she thought of Wheein and her soft way of caring. Heck, she even though of Jiwoo and Sooyoung and their pure relationship because that was what she wanted and deserved.

And as Byul looked around, thinking about a way to escape, just as she crossed her mind, the tall figure of her student’s girlfriend appeared on the right side of the intersection they were stopped at that moment. And before the traffic light changed to green again, she looked at Yongsun, panic and urgent despair in her eyes, “sorry, unnie, I can’t. I n-need to leave, excuse me...”

And Byul unfastened her seatbelt, and offering an apology in the form of a forced smile, she left the car, ignoring Yongsun’s callings of her name and sprinting all the way to Ha Sooyoung, who waited as well for the traffic light to change on top of her scooter, all leather jacket and big intimidating motorbike helmet. When she saw her, a surprised flash of recognition crossed her sharp eyes, “Byul unnie, wha-” was all she could say before her girlfriend’s tutor climbed behind her on her scooter.

“P-Please, Sooyoung-ah… Take me home,” was all Byul could say, Yongsun’s voice calling her name still ringing around them. Sooyoung was confused and her gaze drifted to the expensive car and the angry looking lady that was shooting daggers at her with her eyes. Oh, hell no, she could do that too; Ha Sooyoung wasn’t one to be intimidated, no matter how dangerous the other woman’s aura was. She just knew that a person precious to her girlfriend was a shaking mess clinging to her back and hiding her face between her shoulders and that the desperate looking woman was, most likely, the cause of it. 

So when her traffic light finally changed to green before the one of the blue lambo’s driver did, she gave herself the pleasure to flip the bird her way, muttering a silent fuck you before speeding her scooter down the road, her new destination being Byul’s dorm and her new mission getting her to calm down. She should call Jiwoo as well, to tell her she was going to arrive late to their date; perhaps she could come and help her with her tutor, too. God… This was such a twist of their movie date, there was that.

Back in her car, Yongsun leaned her forehead on the steering wheel, breath ragged and blood pumping in her veins almost aggressively. Too many questions swarming her mind and confusion taking the best of her because she just didn’t understand what made Byul react like that.

She laughed bitterly then because, even though she didn’t know the reason she was sure she deserved it, and even when her traffic light finally changed to green, she kept laughing, forehead against the steering wheel and the sound of the horns of the cars behind hers as the background music for the new crack that opened in her heart.


	15. Chapter 15.

“Sooyoungie, where are you? You are late!” Jiwoo’s whiny voice came from the other side of the line and in a normal situation, it would have made Sooyoung to smile tenderly. But being inside Byul’s dorm while the older girl was getting a well needed shower in the bathroom prevented her from it, too busy with thoughts of how to deal with the obviously distressed woman that climbed on her scooter moments ago. 

“Sorry, baby…” said Sooyoung, sincerely, because she really wanted to go on that movie date with her girlfriend, “but I need you to come to Byul’s unnie dorm, it is quite urgent,” she said and a loud intake of air was the only reply she got, “do you need me to go to pick you up?” Sooyoung asked then, and the muffled sound of a door closing could be heard through the phone, “don’t worry about it, Sooyoungie, there was a taxi nearby and I just got into it, I’ll be there in a couple of minutes!” And just like that, Jiwoo ended the call. 

Sooyoung was left staring at the screen of the phone, a confused glint in her eyes because heck, she didn’t even get to tell her the reason of her request or the fact that the date suddenly got cancelled, she just got on the move with little information; and that made a spark of warmth to ignite in Sooyoung’s chest as a smile flourished on her lips. That was such a Jiwoo thing to do; because she was too caring, enough to drop everything to aid someone important to her in a heartbeat.

The sound of the bathroom door opening took Sooyoung away from her musings, and Byul went back into the room freshly showered and clad in some comfy pajamas. Sooyoung’s brow furrowed slightly; the older woman, always reliable and confident, looked extremely small and vulnerable and Sooyoung didn’t know what to do about it, she wasn’t good when it came to comforting people. So she just stood there, next to the desk, staring at her while Byul walked to the bed and sat there with a sigh.

“Do you need something, unnie?” Sooyoung found herself asking, taking tiny steps towards the bed. Byul looked up at her and offered a small but grateful smile, shaking her head, “it’s fine, I’m okay… I’m sorry I jumped on your scooter out of nowhere, Sooyoung, I am sure you were heading somewhere and instead you ended up here,” regret laced Byul’s voice and Sooyoung was fast on shaking her head, taking seat next to her on the bed.

“It’s fine, unnie, I was going to meet Jiwoo, but I already called her. She is on her way as soon as I told her I was with you,” Sooyoung smiled widely and the thought of Jiwoo dropping everything to come to the rescue was something that made Byul smile as well, even tearing some chuckle out of her, “she is so caring, it’s endearing.” 

Sooyoung nodded a few times, the smile of her face becoming a little bit softer, eyes glistening and lost in memories, “that’s Jiwoo for you, unnie, once she has you she will never let you go,” Byul eyed the younger girl before a new sigh erupted from her lips; how she wished to have something like this healthy and pure relationship instead of something tarnished by her insecurities and inability of reading Yongsun and her intentions, “you really got lucky with her, Sooyoung-ah, please take care of Jiwoo.”

Sooyoung could only nod her head, because before she could even open her mouth to answer, the door of the room opened and, speaking of the devil, Jiwoo herself entered with a look of worry painted on her face and a big plastic bag hanging from her hand. The smell of fried chicken was like a slap on the face and Sooyoung’s stomach growled helplessly. 

Jiwoo left the plastic bag and her purse on the desk and rushed to where the other two girls were sitting, crouching next to Byul to look up at her; Sooyoung’s left eyebrow twitched in amusement when her girlfriend straight up ignored her.

“Byul unnie, are you okay? Are you hurting somewhere? Did someone do something to you?” Jiwoo shot questions as if she was a fire gun and Byul chuckled in response, patting the top of her head with her hand, “I’m fine, don’t worry, Wooming… You came pretty fast, I’m impressed,” said the older woman and Jiwoo’s worried expression, though it didn’t leave her face, made room to a blinding smile as she nodded her head.

“I was nearby, I could have run here but I wanted to stop to get some food because food always helps to make me feel better so I thought I better catch a taxi and make a stop in a street food stall,” Jiwoo was rambling, as she used to, gesturing big with her hands and it was soothing to Byul, in a way. Her positivity and cheerfulness was nothing but contagious, “then I also thought about getting something to drink, so I got some coke. I’m sorry, unnie, perhaps I should have bought a beer for you?” Jiwoo nibbled on her lower lip, looking up at Byul again with her expressive eyes, “coke is fine, Jiwoo. Thank you, really.” 

It was obvious Jiwoo wanted to keep talking, to keep Byul away from whatever was clouding her mind; she wanted to ask what was wrong, but she didn’t know how to get her answers without crossing any boundary, so she dropped it before she could even put the issue back on the table. Instead, she rose to her feet and moved a few steps towards Sooyoung, sitting on her lap and pressing a chaste kiss on her cheek. Sooyoung couldn’t control the big smile that broke her features, and her arms snaked around Jiwoo’s tiny waist, pressing her close.

“Hello to you too, stranger,” said Sooyoung and Jiwoo just smiled, leaning a little against her chest. 

“Thank you for bringing unnie home, Sooyoungie,” at that, Sooyoung just smiled, nodding her head.

Byul watched the interaction with a warm gaze, trying to erase the jealousy that bubbled inside of her chest and any thought of Yongsun that swarmed her head. She couldn’t prevent the sigh that escaped her lips though, and it caught Jiwoo’s attention, like a hunter whose chance to strike was sharper as ever. 

“Are you sure you are okay, unnie?” Sooyoung’s chin ended on top of Jiwoo’s shoulder and a little frow appeared on her face, “yeah, unnie, you were quite distressed… Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it? Perhaps talking will make you feel better,” it was Byul’s turn to nibble on her lower lip, pondering her options. 

Because yes, she wanted to talk about what was eating her inside, wanted to tell them her worries and how damn painful it felt to get your heart crushed over and over again; but then again, the couple were just two teenagers and she really didn’t want to bother them with her problems, after all that’s not what an unnie is supposed to do.

“Let’s say that… I am really, really invested on this woman, but she… I guess she only wants me to pass time and to warm her bed. I don’t know if I can deal with that anymore, it hurts,” identical frows appeared on the teen couple’s faces, and Jiwoo was the first one to reply, outraged, “but that’s awful, unnie! You’re worth a lot, way too much to be reduced to that!” while nodding, Sooyoung suddenly asked, “is she the pretty and angry unnie with the expensive car?” 

Jiwoo’s gaze drifted from Byul to Sooyoung and then to Byul again, and the older woman nodded, “yeah, that’s her,” Sooyoung hissed then. 

“She is an asshole, she looked at me like she wanted to beat me up, as if!!!! I wish I could scratch her car, that bitch,” Sooyoung muttered under her breath, loud enough for Byul to hear her and her words made her chuckle genuinely, “don’t say that, I am pretty fond of that car, actually.”

“You know what, unnie?” said Jiwoo then, dropping her hands to her lap, where absentmindedly she played with Sooyoung’s fingers, “I will tell you the way I always cheer up when I am sad...” she leaned closer to Byul, dropping her voice to a whisper and Byul, humouring her, leaned as well, a smile on her face, “cuddles!” was all she said and Byul could only laugh, just like she always did when it came to Jiwoo, “we can watch a movie and cuddle and eat fried chicken and drink coke and talk about everything and nothing; like a detox therapy for bad thoughts!” Jiwoo jumped off Sooyoung’s lap then, going to the desk to grab the chicken, “move, Sooyoungie! Byul unnie has to be between both of us if we want the cuddle magic to work!”

Byul laughed out loud, both at the way her tiny student bossed her intimidating girlfriend around, and how said intimidating girlfriend complied to everything she asked even if she huffed in protest at first; they really were an interesting match that, oddly, made perfect sense.

And that’s how Byul found herself an hour later; sandwiched between the couple, the three girls cramped on top of Byul’s bed while the empty chicken container laid at their feet and The Wizard of Oz played on the screen of her laptop. She could hear Jiwoo muttering parts of the dialogue, completely invested on the film, while the soft pressure of Sooyoung’s head on her shoulder and her regular breathing indicated that she had fallen asleep mid movie.

And Byul felt at ease for once, in peace and completely relaxed; the warmth of both bodies and their combined aura soothing her soul and pushing away her tormenting thoughts, at least for a while.

“You know what?” Byul asked then, quietly, only for Jiwoo’s ears not to wake Sooyoung up. Jiwoo looked up at her again, “I think I need a change, if I ever want to stop feeling like crap,” Jiwoo nodded again, her expression becoming thoughtful, “I have to see her again next saturday, I made a promise with her. And she also owes me something, so… yeah,” Byul nibbled her lower lip once again, and her next words stung more than what she would ever admit, “but I think I will tell her I don’t want to see her ever again after that,” and she knew that it would hurt, but she was certain anyways that keeping this kind of… relationship with Yongsun would only bring her more pain, if what was between them could even be called a relationship at all.

“I think that’s the best you can do, unnie, and I know you will be able to, I believe in you,” Jiwoo smiled softly in her direction, tenderly even, and her smile only grew instants later, “and now that you talked about change, unnie… Perhaps it isn’t what you were thinking of, but… how do you feel about getting your hair dyed?” 

Byul blinked in surprise and her gaze dropped to her blonde, almost white locks, “my hair dyed?” Byul tasted the words in her mouth and, surprisingly, she wasn’t against the idea at all. 

“Yeah, my sister asked me to buy a box of brown dye for her so I have it here, we can use it on you, I will get another one for my sister later,” Jiwoo was bubbling with enthusiasm and a spark of trepidation ignited inside of Byul’s heart.

Changes were scary most of the time, but if she was determined to do it, any start was as good as other. And as just as Sooyoung woke up with a lost and confused “where am I?”, Byul muttered, “let’s do this,” and the smile that appeared on her face rivaled the one Jiwoo threw her way, full of expectations about an uncertain future and an amount of self-confidence that she had not felt in a long, long time.


	16. Chapter 16.

Once the sun had already set and the dark hues of night time had fallen over Seoul, Yongsun returned home. The drive to her family’s house was a tense one, even though she was alone in the car. Fingers gripped the steering wheel as if she was about to break it; and her jaw was tightly clenched. She just wanted to exit the suffocating hot air that permeated the insides of the blue lambo with the soft scent of Byul’s cologne and the sting of her absence.

Yongsun parked the car once she arrived at the front of her house. Around her, the vast garden glowed between the darkness of the night and the light that poured in from the streets, all pure white melting with black and even her mind felt gray. With a deep sigh she left the car, soul as heavy as her feet as she dragged them towards the imposing entrance of her house, made of pink marble and steel.

She got inside and everything lighted up as her fingers came into contact with the switch behind the door. A large reception hall opened in front of her as the majestic staircase made of white marble that glistened under the light of the chandeliers hanging off the ceiling signaled the way to the upper floor. Distant sounds could be heard coming from one of the many rooms of that maze of a house.

The stairs were an inviting route, but she was feeling far too restless and distressed to go to her room and hide in her bed. Instead, she opted to go right, into the huge living room plunged in darkness, where she just sat on the soft couch and let it hold her body among leather and coldness.

Myriads of thoughts traveled at full speed through her mind, but she felt too numb to try and piece them together in something akin to an idea with a minimum of sense. And before she could even realize what was happening to her, her heartbeat quickened and the air got stuck in her throat as salty translucent pearls spilled from her eyes, and suddenly she couldn’t breathe.

As if they had will on their own, her shaky fingers pressed the speed button of her phone, laboured breathing trying to escape from between her lips almost desperately while she took her phone to her ear. Seconds dragged painfully slow while her chest felt about to burst and she was about to end the call when a familiar and comforting voice said her name at the other side of the line.

“Yong?” A trembling sigh escaped Yongsun’s lips, eyes closing tightly in an attempt of stopping the flow of tears that ran down her face. “E-Eunbi…” Yongsun’s voice was a weak whisper, barely audible.

“Yongsun, are you okay? Are you crying?” Eunbi’s voice was laced with genuine fear and concern and god, Yongsun just wanted to get a grip of herself and stop feeling like this only to prevent that emotion to flourish in her friend’s chest; but she couldn’t, and she hated it. “I can’t b-breathe…” Her words tumbled over one another while her chest heaved in such a frustrating manner that she thought she would end up going crazy for real.

“Yong, do it just like I do, okay? Listen to me,” Eunbi said, trying to give her voice a steady rhythm for her friend and boss to follow, inhaling and exhaling deep and slow breathes. 

Yongsun, like an obedient child, followed the pace Eunbi dictated with every intake of air, noticing how little by little, the tension left her body and she could finally relax on top of the couch; her figure laying weak and tired over the softness of the cushions and the leather. 

“Are you feeling better?” Eunbi asked then, a hint of concern in her voice, nonetheless.

“Yeah, thank you…” Yongsun sighed deeply, inhaling a new breath, her eyes peacefully closed, “I don’t know what happened to me,” her tone was uncertain and it didn’t fool Eunbi at all, as she found herself replying, “bullshit, I know this happened because of that girl that is driving you crazy,” Eunbi’s bluntness was sharp as a knife and it made Yongsun’s body to stiffen on the couch, “am I right?” Yongsun signed again, images of Byul’s panicked face swarming her mind like a tsunami.

“Yes, you are right,” Yongsun admitted then, after all there was no point on trying to fool her best friend, “could you come over, though? I think some company would do me good,” a sigh could be heard from the other side of the line and dread appeared in the pit of Yongsun’s stomach at the answer.

“I am sorry, Yong… I would love to, but I am back at my hometown, it is my mom’s birthday,” Yongsun’s body tensed once again, jaws clenching almost painfully, “but I can stay with you for a while, my family is still getting ready before going out for the night. Wanna tell me what happened?” 

Yongsun’s eyes fixed on the darkness of the ceiling of the living room, sorting out the shape of the chandelier thanks to the light that filtered from the reception hall and, for a second, she got lost in her thoughts; all Moon Byulyi and pain and confusion and a feeling of impotence impossible to ignore.

“I apologized to her, Eunbi,” Yongsun found herself saying, and the tone of her voice must have been relaxed and distant, because Eunbi didn’t answer back, she just kept silent for Yongsun to keep talking, “I apologized to her for ghosting her, but I couldn't tell her the reason I did it. I invented some excuse, which isn’t actually a lie, and told her that I wanted to give her space to focus on her exams. Which is true, though,” Yongsun bit her lower lip, counting the glints that the soft light tore from the crystals of the chandelier as if she was counting stars, “and you know what did she tell me?” Eunbi hummed softly, “that she was studying hard because I promised her to pay for her tuition if she got good grades,” Eunbi hissed then, and a slight frown appeared in Yongsun’s face, “I know, right? Here I am, Kim Yongsun, CEO of Neutrogena and the most foolish bitch in town, falling in love with someone who is only interested on my money. Money, money, it is always the fucking money.” The bite on Yongsun’s voice was almost aggressive, and even her blown gaze hardened in the darkness of the living room.

“No wonder you are that affected, then…” Eunbi manifested in soft understanding voice and Yongsun nodded because yeah, of course that fucked her up, “what did you do after that?”

A hollow laugh escaped Yongsun’s lips then, “I took her to a high couture shop and bought her the most expensive suit of the whole store,” angry tears threatened to fall again from her eyes, as a bitter smile settled on her lips, “and then I asked her to come with me to the penthouse and she just… bolted the fuck up and ran out of my car towards some punk with a scooter who even dared to flip the bird at me, can you fucking believe that?” Yongsun expected many different responses to her words, but what she didn’t expect to hear was her best friend’s stifled laugh, “why are you laughing? That’s not funny!”

“I am sorry, you getting dumped isn’t funny at all, but the fact that some brat with a scooter flipped the bird at you is quite amusing and you can’t tell me otherwise,” Yongsun huffed in protest and closed her eyes once again, “I guess…”

“Yongsun, I have to leave now, but…” Eunbi stopped talking then, hesitation lacing her voice and impregnating the heavy silence that elongated for a few seconds, “you should reconsider your situation with this girl. You shouldn’t get more invested with her if she is only behind the thickness of your wallet. You deserve better than that,” Yongsun sighed, and a sad smile painted on her face, eyes still closed, “do I really? I am not that sure.”

Before Eunbi could answer, the bell of the door broke the silence of the house and, confused, Yongsun sat on the couch, “what the…” 

“Perhaps you should go and get the door?” Eunbi said and Yongsun could hear the smile in her voice, “what did you do?” Yongsun walked towards the door and her question was answered with a giddy silence. When she opened the door she found herself face to face with a delivery boy that handed her a plastic bag and a million won smile.

“Miss Kim Yongsun? I have an order of teokkbokki and soju for you,” Yongsun’s eyes opened wide and before she could even answer the boy, Eunbi’s voice spoke in her ear, “enjoy the food, Yong, my treat since I can’t be there comforting you. And please, think about what I told you.” And with that, her best friend and secretary ended the call.

Minutes later, Yongsun was back on the living room, this time properly illuminated by the sharp light of the chandelier, eating her precious teokkbokki with a grateful smile on her lips. She could give up many things in her life, and as much, she hated some aspects of her mere existence. But she could never survive without Eunbi, and with every bite of food she was more and more sure of it. She would even follow her to hell if it was necessary.

And Yongsun did as her precious friend told her, and let her mind wander. And as always, as soon as the door of her thoughts opened, images of Byul barged in stampede; Byul running away from her car, her panicked gaze, her words that pierced her heart without the younger girl even knowing. The way her body trembled under her hands and how her smile made her soul feel lighter than ever.

Was it worthy, though? Byul was worth the money if that’s was she wanted, but was putting her heart, one she believed to be made of steel and stone, on the line for someone who really didn’t want her? Yongsun went through many painful situations in her life, but nothing prepared her for how awful was a heartbreak. And she really wasn’t sure anymore if Byul was worth the pain she gave her.

Her musings got interrupted by the familiar sound of a small engine and, placing the now empty container of teokkbokki on top of the couch, she stood up next to the piece of furniture, turning towards the entrance of the living room in time to see her father at the door.

“Yongsun,” his deep voice boomed and reverberated between the walls, his tone severe and commanding, and Yongsun flinched involuntarily, “come help me get into bed, I sent the nurse home already.” And just with that, he turned around, the mechanic sound of the engine of his wheelchair tracing the route to his room on the first floor. Yongsun followed him, hands clenched in fists and an ill feeling trying to flourish in her chest, as she knew what his words entailed; a long talk that she wouldn’t appreciate at all.

So she pushed her thoughts about Byul and all her emotions at the back of her mind again, and emptied herself of everything, so his words wouldn’t sting as much as they did when she was a child. Because she wasn’t a child anymore, she was an adult. She was Kim Yongsun. And Kim Yongsun always had everything under her control.


	17. Chapter 17.

Saturday creeped like a dark stormy cloud in an already gloomy sky, threatening and electrifying. Byul looked at her reflection on the mirror, nervousness making her pupils shake while they traveled all over her suit clad figure. The black suit arrived on Thursday and it was finally the day to put it to good use.

It hugged her body just perfectly, adjusting to every curve and edge as if it was a second skin, but still loose enough to be comfortable. It really was worth the money it costed. The set of pants and jacket came accompanied by a vest that fitted her just right, so much that in the end she even opted to wear it without a shirt underneath.

A black and thin choker highlighted the pale skin of her neck and her newly dyed dark brown hair fell down her shoulders like a chocolate waterfall. To be honest, she still found herself weird-looking with such a dark shade, but she would be lying if she said she didn’t dig it.

She looked stunning, if she was being sincere, but still it did nothing to soothe the nerves that threatened to obliterate her heart at any moment. It was the end, that day. No matter the outcome of the night, today was the last day of her emotional turmoil. She was going to come clean to Yongsun and she was dead-set on forcing the older woman to do the same.

“Unnie, are you ready? I want to see you!!” A chirpy and loud voice could be heard from the room and Byul took the chance to sigh the nervousness away. Or at least a bit of it. So she separated from the mirror with a last look at her reflection and finally opened the door of the bathroom, coming back to her dorm room, where two expectant pair of eyes filled with curiosity stared at her in awe.

A thud was heard and the book Wheein was holding on her hands rested on the carpeted floor, as if it just slipped from the younger woman’s hands, Wheein’s incredulous gaze fixed on Byul; and before both Wheein and Byul could say anything, a loud whistle rang through the whole room.

“Damn, unnie, you look hot as hell!” An excited Jiwoo exclaimed from the bed, jumping on her butt on top of the mattress, “if it wasn’t because I am madly in love with Sooyoungie already I can totally see myself crushing on you, unnie!”

Byul laughed at that and the knot in her throat untangled slightly, poking her tongue out in a joking manner to the youngest girl in the room. Her stare finally set on Wheein, who looked at her with a deep frown between her brows, “what’s wrong, Wheein?”

“Man, I’m just mad I wasn’t the one who got the deal, the suit is amazing and you look great, unnie,” Wheein’s dimpled smile was on her face in a second as she crouched down to get the book, “you even made me drop this, what even…” Byul sighed, relieved.

“You two flatter me too much!” She exclaimed, but the smile that creeped on her face couldn’t be hidden. 

“We just hype you up, unnie. Right, Wheein unnie?” Jiwoo chirped from the bed, eyes twinkling with euphoria at the prospect of Byul’s night, “and I know that once you walk out this door, you will get your shit together and do what you have to do,” Wheein said while nodding, going to the bed to sit next to Jiwoo.

Byul looked at her two friends with a mix of fondness and amusement; it was the first time Jiwoo and Wheein meet each other, but they acted just as if they were sisters. Two sunshines in the same room and it was so full of light that Byul feared she would go blind at any time. But it still warmed her heart how fast two of the most important people in her life clicked.

“Thank you so much for doing this for me, girls,” Byul came close to them, holding each of their hands in a soft squeeze, “there are snacks in the closet and a lot of movies in the laptop, just feel as if you were at home.”

The two younger girls nodded at the same time, looking at each other then for a second before looking back at Byul. “Don’t worry, unnie, Jiwoo and I will stay here in case you need us when you come back,” Wheein squeezed Byul’s hand again, tighter, and next to her, Jiwoo nodded with a bright smile on her face, “don’t worry about us, we will get to know each other better while we wait. But honestly? I hope you won’t come back, that would mean that the night ended well for you!”

A hearty laugh bubbled from Byul’s chest then. Yeah, that would be amazing, not to come back home that night. But at that point of the game, it felt like wishful thinking and nothing else.

It was that moment when the sound of Yongsun’s notification in Byul’s phone broke the warm aura that floated around the three women and Byul’s body tensed sharply. Worried eyes followed her movements when she took the phone out of the pocket of the jacket to read the text she just received. Byul gulped and both Wheein and Jiwoo held their breath.

“She parked outside,” is the whisper that left Byul’s lips and, like a spring, Jiwoo jumped off the bed, latching her hands to Byul’s arm.

“Don’t be nervous, unnie. You got this,” Jiwoo tried to reassure the oldest girl, who was able to just nod weakly, “you look amazing and you will render her speechless and she will realize that she will be missing the best thing if she doesn’t take her head out of her own ass.”

“Yeah, but you should really be going, don’t make her wait,” said Wheein then, going to the door of the room to open it for Byul, “we will go with you outside, is that okay with you?”

Byul nodded again as response, and after placing her wallet and phone in her pockets, the three girls left the room and started their way downstairs. A whole minute later, they arrived at the entrance of the dorm and, before stepping outside, Byul took a new deep breath, the blue lambo already visible through the translucent doors.

Once outside, a small gasp left Jiwoo’s lips, her hold on Byul’s hand tightening for a second, “I can’t see her face but holy crap… is that a Lamborghini?” Byul just nodded and turned around to look at her friends for one last time, Jiwoo and Wheein’s stare going up to meet Byul’s troubled gaze.

“Everything is going to be alright, unnie.” And Byul believed them, so she managed a small smile in their direction before starting her way towards the luxurious car, her steps heavy and almost trembling.

Her gaze was trained on Yongsun, even through the glass of the car window, and, when she found the older woman’s gaze already staring back at her, her breath got stuck in her throat. She was, unsurprisingly, radiant. As far as she could see, a white dress hugged her body and her hair fell in waves over her shoulders. A small silver tiara was a finishing touch on top of her head.

Once Byul got inside the car, her whole body tensed helplessly. Yongsun’s gaze was unwavering, fixed on her own pupils. The glint in her eyes was warm and it almost seemed as if Yongsun was in awe for a second too long and it tied a knot in Byul’s stomach. But then she blinked and suddenly Byul couldn’t read her anymore.

“You look… you look amazing, Byul,” Yongsun’s voice was raspy and she even cleared her throat, and that on its own made Byul to feel extremely accomplished.

“You look beautiful too, Yongsun unnie,” was Byul’s response, and seeing that the older woman didn’t start to drive, she lifted one of her eyebrows, a smug smirk getting painted on her lips, “shouldn’t we leave?”

Yongsun cleared her throat, tearing her gaze away from Byul while the younger woman turned towards her friends, who looked at her expectantly from the entrance of her dorm. She waved goodbye in their direction as Yongsun started driving deep into Seoul’s early night roads.

The ride was silent, and the silence was laced with uncertainty and discomfort emanating from both women, unsaid words floating in the air aiming at them with a sincere bow and a lethal arrow pointing straight to their hearts. Byul’s thoughts drifted for a second, her resolve to give Yongsun a piece of her mind wavering slightly now that the opportunity presented itself; after all, if it was probably going to be the last time she saw the older woman, she better make the most out of it and leave the confrontation for later.

“Are you nervous?” Yongsun’s voice broke the tense silence and Byul turned her gaze towards her. It was kind of ironic, that question, given the fact that Yongsun was holding the steering wheel in a white knuckled grip that screamed nervousness and internal turmoil.

“I am, not gonna lie,” Byul’s gaze was still trained on Yongsun’s side profile, her head resting comfortably against the soft fabric of the headrest, “I am in no way used to these kinds of situations, but I hope it will be fine.” Yongsun’s stare met Byul’s for a second before looking back at the road, “you look more nervous than me, though.”

“I have to do a speech, I hate these things,” Yongsun exhaled a deep breath, but the whiteness of her knuckles became even more pronounced when her grip tightened. Deep down, Byul guessed it wasn’t the whole reason.

“I see… Well, I will be cheering for you, unnie,” was the last thing Byul said before tearing her gaze away from Yongsun’s face, missing by a silly second how the older woman features softened in a small smile.

“Thank you, Byul-ah.”

Awkwardness started to vanish after that small conversation got to an end, and an easy feeling floated around, making the ride more comfortable for both of them, lost in their thoughts while the car ate meters of asphalt on its way to the party. It didn’t take them long to reach the venue, a humongous building flashing in fiery white lights against the darkness of the sky, like thunder breaking stormy clouds.

Yongsun parked right in front of the venue and soon after, the car was being driven away by the valet that was waiting for the party attendants. At that moment, Byul was able to take Yongsun in properly, now that she could finally appreciate the way the white dress fell down her figure and adjusted to her curves and edges in a way that shouldn’t be, by any mean, legal. Byul stopped breathing for a second the moment their gazes met each other again, and her heart speeded in a crazy race when the still tense face of the older woman relaxed in a small smile.

“Are you ready?” Yongsun’s voice was tiny, the smallest Byul ever heard it, and she nodded. But if she was being honest, she would have nodded to everything Yongsun said at that point.

Yongsun’s arm sneaked around Byul’s and both of them started their way inside the venue of the party. The bright lights made Yongsun’s dress to glow, and it was such a majestic view that Byul couldn’t look away.

“You look… beautiful, unnie,” Byul breathed out, her mind clogged by the woman holding her arm and even the whole purpose of her night lost every ounce of importance. Yongsun just chuckled softly, her hand gripping Byul’s arm for a second in acknowledgement. 

“So do you, Byul-ah. I hope we can have fun tonight,” Yongsun’s tone was sincere and finally somehow relaxed and Byul found herself smiling back at her, not even noticing how they reached the big and luxuriously adorned hall, even if they were just two more beings in the middle of a sea of people.

“Oh, Yongsun-nim!” A high voice in broken Korean exclaimed and Byul found herself face to face with… A huge white bird? She blinked a few times, surprised, but before she could even ask, Yongsun whispered next to her.

“Don’t ask… Ah, Takayanagi-san, it’s nice to see you!” Yongsun’s tone went higher and a polite smile graced her features, her hand still gripping at Byul’s arm, “let me introduce you to my date for tonight, she is Moon Byulyi. Byul-ah, these are two members of our Japanese branch, we are working together in a joint project. Meet Takayanagi Akane-san,” Yongsun pointed at the woman with the extravagant and certainly hideous bird themed hat, who was looking up at her with such a bright smile that Byul thought she would get blinded by it, “and Matsui Rena-san.” At that, once Byul’s stare travelled to a slightly taller woman, she could feel her jaw almost touching the floor. It was like if the most precious and delicate doll ever created was alive and standing in front of them; black hair framing a small face of soft features and eyes so brown that one could drown in them. Byul was dazed, after all she did have it bad for pretty girls.

Until Yongsun faked a cough next to her and it took Byul out of her reverie, greeting both women with a small bow and a few words in broken Japanese, “nice to meet you,” the smile on her face was polite and charming, and the brunette beauty chuckled slightly, eyes turning into pretty crescents.

“Nice to meet you, Byulyi. Yongsun-nim, you have a great taste in girls!” Rena’s voice was soft and buttery and Byul’s smile was dopey in response at the praise. Yongsun’s grip on her arm tightened for a second before relaxing.

“I do, don’t I? Well, if you excuse us…” And before she could even bid her farewell to the Japanese couple, Byul was being dragged away by Yongsun.

“Well, that was a very ugly hat…” Was all Byul commented and it was enough to stop Yongsun’s sudden wave of jealousy, as she laughed softly in response. “It is, oh my god… Takayanagi-san is really crazy about birds…”

“And Matsui-san is… really pretty,” Yongsun rolled her eyes for a second, ending up nodding her head. “She is, indeed. She is one of the main models of the Japanese branch, apart from one of the developers and face of many products. She is such an ace in our company, and a really valuable asset.” Yongsun’s gaze was sharp for a second, drilling holes in Byul’s pupils, “I thought I better put some basin under your chin, to catch all that drool, though.” Byul’s eyebrow twitched in amusement, a half smile starting to grow in her lips.

“Why? Are you jeal-?” She couldn’t finish her sentence, as again they were interrupted by a new voice, this time deeper and huskier. Byul had never heard a female voice such as that.

“My, my, Kim Yongsun! I was wondering if you were going to attend or not,” Yongsun’s body tensed as if she got electrocuted and, with the fakest smile Byul had even seen, she turned towards the source of the voice and, just then, Byul did the same. And, oh man, what did they put in Neutrogena company’s water for all the women in this party to be this… outstanding?

“Yubin unnie, good night,” the older woman’s voice was nonchalant and certainly bored, but her body language screamed discomfort at this new presence next to them, and Byul didn’t take long to understand the reason.

Yubin, as Yongsun called her, was such a... woman. Not too tall, but voluptuous, with perfectly tanned skin and dark eyes that exclaimed danger with every blink. The way her black dress clung to her body had to be one of the seven sins because Byul couldn’t take her gaze away from her healthy hips; and when she forced herself to, her eyes met Yubin’s as she was already looking back at her, with a hungry glint that ignited a spark of trepidation inside of her chest, much to Byul’s dismay.

“And who are you, huh?” Her voice was husky and it even dropped an octave when she addressed her and Byul never thought she had a thing for husky voices until that day.

“She is Byul, my date,” Byul’s gaze snapped towards Yongsun as fast as lightning. Yongsun’s voice was as sharp as a knife and the bite of her tone didn’t go unappreciated to her, and she was sure that Yubin picked it up as well when the corners of her mouth curled in a feline smile.

It was like watching a match that would end with the death of one of them, and these two dominant energies clashing against one another in front of her had her on edge. She never felt more thrilled; watching Yongsun trying to assert dominance and possessiveness over her against someone that finally rivaled her in that aspect was something she never thought she would ever see. Like ever. It was flattering, in a way, and she was enjoying like a kid in a candy store.

Finally, Yubin chuckled lowly, her gaze leaving Yongsun’s heated browns to drill holes again in Byul’s pupils. The youngest woman held her breath for a second.

“Nice to meet you, Byulyi. I hope to see you again around here and perhaps drink something together. I will leave you two alone,” and with one last look in Yongsun’s direction, the tanned beauty left and, finally, Yongsun’s body relaxed with a frustrated huff.

“Now, what was that…” Byul wondered aloud, her gaze still trained on Yubin’s swaying hips for a second too long before looking back at Yongsun.

“That’s Kim Yubin, head of marketing department and full time pain in the ass,” she rolled her eyes, taking her hands to her temples to rub them softly.

“I guess you are not in good terms, then…”

“She is so conceited and fake, I can’t stand her,” Yongsun sighed then and finally opened her eyes again, taking Byul’s hand in hers, “I am sorry you had to see that, we are always butting heads. Her hobby is to annoy me, it seems.” The small smile Yongsun sent her way was apologetic and a flutter appeared in her heart at that. Flutter that turned into a full fledged tornado when the brightness of Yongsun’s smile grew bigger, her gaze lost somewhere over Byul’s shoulder.

“Eunbi!” She exclaimed and Byul turned around just to see how a woman with a smile as bright as Yongsun’s made her way towards them.

“Yong! I have been looking for you!” The woman called Eunbi embraced Yongsun in a hug and Byul would have frowned at that if it wasn’t for the look of pure bliss that took over Yongsun’s face. It was enough to melt any negative feeling away and damn, she just wanted to kiss her right then, right there.

“You know me, I am always around, somewhere,” Yongsun laughed softly and finally she looked back at Byul, still with that gorgeous smile painting her face of happiness and Byul wanted to see her always like that. “Byul-ah, this is Kwon Eunbi, my best friend and secretary. Eunbi, this is Byul,” the tone of Yongsun’s voice changed slightly and Byul couldn’t read into it, but a flash of recognition crossed Eunbi’s brown irises before greeting her.

“Nice to meet you,” was all Byul said, offering a polite smile. “Likewise,” was Eunbi’s response, her smile growing even more if it was possible, “I have heard a lot about you, Byul.”

At that, Byul’s heart skipped a beat and she stole a side glance at Yongsun when she felt her tense next to her for a second, finding her throwing daggers at her friend with her sharp pupils. And she wondered then, what did the older woman even told her friend about her and their relationship.

“I hope it was all good things, though?” Eunbi’s eyes sparkled with mischief for a moment and Byul thought Yongsun was ready to pounce at any second.

“Well, it ind-” but Eunbi couldn’t even start exposing Yongsun on whatever there was to expose, because right then a deep voice boomed next to them, drowning out even the background noise that was the conversations that were taking place at that time around them and the music that had been playing consistently since they arrived.

“Yongsun,” and at that Yongsun startled, her body physically wincing and her hands gripping Byul’s arm stronger than ever.

Eunbi moved aside, and behind her, appeared a man on a wheelchair. Byul blinked, feeling slightly intimidated by the strong aura emanating from him. His hair was black and thick and his eyes were cold and stoic even if his features were kind of soft, nonetheless. He looked familiar, in a way she couldn’t really pinpoint. Until Yongsun spoke next to her and she felt how the colour left her face in an instant.

“Father.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, hello!  
> this is as far what was posted of the au in twitter thread format, so from now on the updates will be slower! just a heads up, because so far i have been posting everyday multiple chapters because i already had them written.  
> thanks for reading and stay tuned for more in the future, luckily soon!


	18. Chapter 18.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, sorry for the delay!  
> But life happens and it hits us in the ass from time to time, isn't it?  
> I just wanna say that I haven't abandoned this story! I will take it to its end, but if I take my sweet time again, please understand and be patient, we all have our stuff going on in our lives, don't we?  
> Anyway, enough babbling, I hope you are in for some pain, lol.

“Father.”

Byul stole a glance in Yongsun’s direction when she heard the tension dripping from her voice, her hands like claws clutching on her arm; but her attention was soon stolen by the intense presence of the man on a wheelchair, whose stony dark eyes were fixed on her.

She could see the resemblance, she was not a fool. The same pointy noise and the soft round cheeks were the most prominent features of both father and daughter, though his were hidden partially behind a well-shaved beard. He was tall and fit, too, and Byul couldn’t help to wonder how did he even got to end on a wheelchair.

His eyes, though, were freezing cold. Like a frozen lake, deep and threatening. And they were scanning Byul’s whole body in that very moment, stopping for one second too long on the hold his daughter had over her arm. If that fact had some kind of effect on him, he didn’t show it, instead, he looked up towards Byul’s face once again.

“Father, this is By-” was Yongsun’s small attempt to introduce her to the man that, even from a wheelchair, dominated everybody surrounding him, her voice sounding insecure and small, like Byul had never heard it before, and a spark of worry ignited in her chest. How could a man elicit such a response from his own daughter? She remembered her late father fondly, as he was a warm and cheerful man, but it seemed, now more than ever, that not all families were the same.

“So you are my daughter’s new slut,” his voice was husky, obscure even, and on his face Byul had yet to see a change of expression. He wore a mask of indifference as if he was a master tactician, one whose gambling could never be guessed and whose hand was always the winner. Still, his words were sharp and their cutting edge was reinforced by the truth behind them, and Byul could only flinch and shrink in front of his strong icy gaze; just as if a knife just pierced through her already damaged heart. She felt Yongsun flinching next to her as well, and even felt the panicked and worried look she sent her way, but she couldn’t look away from her father.

“I have to say, though, that I am glad she has improved in her choice of women. Last year she brought a filthy whore, almost naked and drunk the moment she took a step inside this very same hall, but this year…” The man let out a soft, appreciative sound, nodding his head as he looked at his daughter again, “at least she is decently dressed. Is that a Thom Browne? I hope you had fun bedding her, Yongsun, because those suits are not cheap.”

With every word said by Yongsun’s father, Byul felt how her insides twisted, as if the knife that was already hilt deep into her heart kept on rotating and slashing in all directions, with the sole purpose of inflicting the greatest pain possible. It was like a slap of reality, like a jar of cold water being dropped over her shoulders, like a wake up call. She had set a goal for that night and she completely forgot about it in the middle of the giddiness of just being with Yongsun, and the play of pretending to be hers suddenly showed its game over screen.

“Anyway, it is not like you will stick around her for too long, isn’t it?” He spoke again, the tone of his voice condescending to not end, and Byul clenched her jaw so hard she thought she was gonna crack her teeth, “it is what you always do, after all. You find a new toy to play, your spend a generous amount of money in expensive gifts and, after you bed them a few times, you get bored and then it is time to hunt again,” Yongsun’s father sighed deeply, his eyes moving again towards Byul’s face, “I still hope she will get back to her senses and just set with a good man of her same level. It is nothing personal, kid,” the man even had the audacity to smile in her direction, as if he didn’t just destroyed the last ounce of self-confidence and hope she had in her for the night.

“Father!” Yongsun’s voice boomed next to her then. She was shaking, Byul could feel it in the way she was still holding onto her arm. Byul was sure she was fuming, red hot with a mix of fury and hopelessness, but at that time, the younger woman couldn’t care less. 

She felt hollow inside. It wasn’t like she didn’t know she wasn’t special, it wasn’t like she didn’t know that she was part of a game that Yongsun was too used to playing. But at least she still had the smallest sliver of hope and she was clinging to it, desperately. And she just felt it vanish between her fingers as if it was nothing. She felt cold, as if she was thrown into a frozen mass of water and her body just hit and broke the icy surface to just drown in the depths, the coldness biting her entire being with the sharp teeth of this man’s words.

“It is enough, father,” Yongsun’s voice quivered next to her, but Byul couldn’t even look her way. Next to the man, Eunbi’s pale and wide-eyed face looked at them, not knowing where to hide and not knowing what to say, if there was even something she could have said in that situation, that is.

“Yes, it is enough, indeed,” Yongsun’s father leaned against the back of his wheelchair, trying to find a more comfortable position, “so you better stop playing with your little thing and come with me. You have work to do, stop being an embarrassment at least for one second.” His already severe voice became even harsher, a spark of disapproval being more than obvious in his black pupils, “Eunbi, you too, come with me. Help this disaster of a woman you call your boss to do her job properly; I didn’t invest all my life working on this company for you to stain my name like this every single year.”

After these last words left his mouth, Yongsun’s father turned away on his wheelchair and disappeared into the crowd of people that chatted among each other, unknowing of what has just transpired between the four of them. The silence he left behind was thick and tense, almost palpable to the touch and Byul just wanted to leave and hide under her covers and never show her face again to the outside world.

“Byul-ah…” Yongsun’s voice was soft, trembling even, but Byul wasn’t sure if it was of anger or frustration or something else. Byul’s eyes closed and the air she didn’t notice she was holding this entire time left her lungs in a discreet sigh that tasted bitter and that hurt the very core of her being; where that pointy bleeding knife was still cutting her heart away. She opened her eyes again, fixing an empty stare on Yongsun’s brown eyes.

She felt the usual pull towards her, but at the same time… she felt nothing. Nothing but the sadness that swallowed everything on its path and that, right now, was swallowing Byul’s entire soul. She was a toy. She was a slut. She was… a fool.

“I’m sor-” Yongsun’s voice was cut by Eunbi the moment she tore away from Byul’s arm her best friend’s hands, her frantic eyes moving from one woman to the other before fixing themselves on her boss’ face.

“This is not the time, Yong, you need to go, do the speech and get free of your obligations for tonight,” her gaze became firmer the more she talked, trying to take Yongsun off the despaired state Byul didn’t even know she was into. Oh, but Eunbi did know, Eunbi could clearly see it in the way her best friend’s chest heaved, in the desperation lacing her tone and in the pain the was about to make her eyes to glisten with tears in front of this suit clad woman that looked at her with a chill inducing stare that rivaled the one of the man that caused all this mess. _Fucking hell, everything was going great_ , were the words repeating again and again in Eunbi’s mind, “do your job and then you two will be able to talk and sort this out, okay?” These last words were said in a softer tone, away from Byul’s ears and, with her shaky hands embraced by her friend’s warm ones, Yongsun nodden her head slowly.

The oldest woman turned again towards her date, who was looking at her without actually seeing her, gaze unfocused and pained; and schooling her features into her perfected mask of indifference, she said, “we’ll talk later, okay?”

And just like that, she was gone, dragging Eunbi away as they followed the path her father took moments before. And Byul was all alone, looking at her retreating figure, white and shiny and pristine and she didn’t know what to do, where to go, where to hide. So she did what anyone in her situation would do…

She walked up to the bar and sat down on one of the numerous high stools that were lined in front of it and the bartender didn’t take long before approaching her with a courteous smile on his face and the question of what did she want to drink dripping from his lips.

“Soju, please,” said Byul, her voice empty and her gaze still lost while the words of Yongsun’s father still resonated through her mind, cutting and burning and kicking her more than dead resolution. When the bartender took a small soju glass and a bottle of the liquor to pour it, she grabbed his wrist, looking up at his eyes for a second, “leave the bottle here, thank you.” The bartender’s left eyebrow rose slightly, wondering if he should actually oblige, but something in this woman’s eyes compelled him to do so.

So he left the bottle next to her full glass and Byul could only paint the ghost of a smile on her lips before that expression was also washed away by the tornado of emptiness and sadness that had taken over her. Because it stings, you know? She went all out that night, with the sole purpose of confessing her feelings, with the only goal to know what lays under Yongsun’s mysterious heart. And it wasn’t like she thought she had many possibilities of all of it going her way, you know, the kind of “she got the girl and they were happy forever” ending, but if there was even the most minimum chance, she wanted to hold onto it for her dear life.

But it was all wiped away, the hopes and dreams of kisses and I love yous and her desire of her happiness and Yongsun’s being one. It was frustrating, terribly, but at the same time it was also relieving; what ifs stopped being a burden and she felt extremely liberated, because there was nothing that could go wrong, not anymore. So she just was going to sit there, get wasted, wait for Yongsun to end doing her thing and then talk to her. She would tell her to stop toying with her, that she didn’t want to be her little slut-toy anymore. Would she confess, anyway? Probably not, she felt ridiculous enough already.

The shots of soju flew from the glass to her mouth at a high speed, and Byul didn’t even flinch when the strong taste hit her tongue again and again, mind too focused in everything and nothing at the same time. She didn’t even notice when a body sat on the stool next to her until a long strong hand placed its palm on top of her wrist, preventing her from drinking anymore.

A frown took over her features, her blurred gaze fixed on those slender and tanned fingers. In her drunk haze, her gaze wandered up a thin arm until she found the feline smile that Kim Yubin was sending her way, her pearly whites exposed in a crooked gesture of amusement that was accompanied by the rise of one single eyebrow.

“Getting comfy, I see,” was what the woman said before a raspy and deep laugh escaped her lips, and Byul could only try to blink the alcohol away, “you are pretty beaten up already, I don’t think you should keep drinking, Byul-nim,” Yubin said once her laugh died down, her cat-like smile still dancing on her lips.

“Do you think so?” Byul’s words were somehow slurred, and given that the older woman’s hand was still holding her wrist, she took the soju glass with her free hand, bringing it up in a silent toast before drinking its content in a big swing. She let her tongue run over her lips after that, wanting even the last drop of alcohol inside of her system, and she turned again to Yubin, a shaky smile on her face, “I disagree with you, though.”

A new hearty laugh bloomed in Yubin’s throat and Byul found herself laughing along with her, the company and the buzz of the alcohol being distraction enough of the gnawing of her gloomy thoughts and everything Yongsun that was always threatening and lurking from the shadows of her mind.

“I also think, Byul-nim, that after a whole big bottle of soju for yourself you should indulge in a small walk around to clear up your thoughts, we don’t want you to puke all over these expensive ass carpets, don’t we?” Yubin’s fingers were still on top of her wrist, and Byul could feel their warmth even through the thick fabric of the suit jacket. The woman’s eyes were alluring, dark and deep and she could swear they held dangerous secrets for her to unveil. So she licked her lips again, slowly this time, and when she saw Yubin’s gaze dropping to her mouth and following the movement, she made up her mind the best she could, among clouds of booze and heartbreak.

“I wouldn’t be opposed to a walk, to be honest. Would you show me around?” Byul’s free hand found its way on top of Yubin’s, thin pale fingers tracing smooth circles over more tanned skin.

The game of seduction can either be a convoluted art difficult to master or something as natural as breathing, and at times like this, when Byul just wanted a escape of the torrent of shit that threatened to spill over her mind again, even through the distraction that the alcohol was, to flirt was like a second nature, as she was in desperate need of an exit. And exits were never as hot as Kim Yubin and the promise of a thrilling experience that lurked in her eyes in that very moment.

So when both women left the bar, they didn’t even notice Kim Yongsun getting on the central stage, stopping in front of a mic, her speech firmly held in her still shaky hands. They didn’t notice the sharp and furious and desperate gaze that followed them until they disappeared in the crowd and around the corner into one of the long hallways of the humongous building.

And when Kim Yubin pressed her against the wall of said hallway and took her lips in a searing hot kiss that tasted of nothing but booze and sadness, Moon Byulyi could only kiss back, tongues meeting in a dance which main purpose was to make her forget, at least for an instant, that she felt nothing but hopeless emptiness inside, that she was broken beyond repair, and that the knife that was plunged into her heart was still bleeding, and every red drop falling screamed Yongsun’s name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was actually intented to be so much longer, but I decided to split it in halves, since the second part is mostly on Yongsun's point of view.  
> I will try to finish the remaining part and update again soon.  
> Thank you so much for reading and please, don't forget to leave behind a comment with your thoughts, it would be really appreciated!  
> Again, sorry for the wait and see you soon!


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